Online Reporter
Employee Relations
Dr Request Machimbira
The workplace is not a stroll in the park. It is not a garden party where everything is manicured, polite and predictable.
It is a theatre of pressure, ambition, targets, personalities, profit, loss and human frailty. It is where dreams are built and sometimes broken. It is where competence is tested and character is revealed. Because it is human, things go wrong. For the employer, the market may shift, costs may balloon, strategy may fail and trust may be betrayed.
For the employee, the culture may become toxic, growth may stall, values may be compromised or dignity may be eroded until the place becomes untenable. And when that happens, separation becomes inevitable. We call them forced separations. They are those departures that arise not from desire, but from necessity. An employee who wakes up and realises he can no longer breathe in that environment will tender his resignation. Similarly, an employer who concludes the contract no longer serves its purpose will initiate a parting of ways.
Separation, in itself, is not abnormal. All working relationships have a lifecycle. People join, learn, contribute, outgrow and leave. Not all terminations are civil. That is the truth we often gloss over with polite farewell emails and perfunctory handshakes. Some are dignified. Others are deeply acrimonious. Accusations fly. Emails get leaked. Voices are raised in boardrooms and corridors. Pain sits heavy on both sides. But acrimony, however real it feels in the moment, does not have to become your identity. When separation finally happens, both employer and employee must accept one sobering, liberating truth: There is life after the relationship.
The organisation will continue to open its doors tomorrow morning. The employee will continue to wake up with skills, talent and years ahead. How you live that afterlife depends on how you manage the divorce.
Not all battles are worth fighting.
I have watched employers who, upon parting with an employee, rush to publish notices in newspapers and on social media, advising the public that Mr So-and-so is no longer associated with the company and the public should no longer transact with him.
I find this weird. An employment contract is a private matter between two parties. It is not news for public consumption. Unless there is proven fraud or serious legal risk, what does the public gain from your internal fallout?
Professional maturity dictates that you advise key customers about the new liaison person, you secure your systems, you thank the departing employee for their service, even if through gritted teeth. You do not need to add unproductive details. Restraint is not weakness; it is leadership.
On the other hand, there are angry ex-employees who find sudden heroism in bashing their former employers on their social media handles.
Long threads, cryptic quotes, sarcastic memes, screenshot wars. They gather an audience of sympathisers for a day and mistake applause for vindication. That is not heroism and it shows not a grain of maturity. Attempting to blow out your former employer’s candle will most likely blow out your own.
Readers are not dumb. Recruiters read. Clients read. Future employers read. They are not just reading what you say about your ex-employer; they are reading who you are when you are hurt. They are asking themselves: If it goes wrong with us, will this be us next?
The angry ex-employee syndrome unearths so many variables that we rarely confront in our own anger.
First, employers do not hire employees so that they can fire them. Recruitment, induction and training are expensive. No sane employer says, “Let us employ John so that in six months we can fire him.” There is always a reason. Sometimes, painfully, you could be the reason. Perhaps your attitude slipped. Perhaps your performance dipped. Perhaps you stopped being coachable. Perhaps the business changed and you refused to change with it.
Or maybe you got big-headed and forgot the power dynamics. Introspection is not betrayal; it is growth.
There is a reason the windscreen is bigger than the rear-view mirror. The forward view is bigger because the forward is more important and needs to be protected. You cannot drive your life forward while staring in the rear-view mirror. What is behind you is smaller for a reason. Wisdom is the best protector of destiny. You protect your future not by polishing your past grievances, but by guarding your vision.
Merchandising your anger against an ex-employer is highly unlikely to improve your standing.
In fact, it devalues it. We live in a world of due diligence. Before anyone hires you, partners with you, funds you or promotes you, they will search you.
Every statement you have ever made matters. Every bitter post is a permanent exhibit. A moment of venting can cost you a decade of opportunity. In a small market like ours, your digital footprint is your reference letter.
There are employees who, wounded by how they left, have refused to do a proper handover. No notes. No files. Assets not returned. Laptops withheld. Passwords changed and not shared. Client contacts deleted.
Some, months after leaving, are still quietly accessing emails from their former workplace through a lingering login. This is not revenge; it is self-sabotage.
One day the law will catch up with you. Data, intellectual property and company assets are not yours to keep as emotional ransom. Integrity is proven not when you are celebrated, but when you are aggrieved.
Anger is career-limiting. It narrows your vision, poisons your language and shortens your network. Angry people rarely get referrals. No one wants to recommend a walking storm to their own client. Your talent may open the door, but your temperament will decide if you stay in the room.
If you are really as good or as innocent as you claim to be, go and prove it at your next job or in your business. The world does not celebrate victims; it celebrates victors.
You are never going to be celebrated for being hurt by a former employer. You will be celebrated for building something better after being hurt. Your next performance is your best revenge.
This article is by no means a call to see no evil or speak no evil. It is not about burying the lessons of the past. You must carry the lessons. But you must not allow yourself to be buried by your own anger. There is a difference between learning from the past and living in it.
The future needs to be protected, and how you manage your own exit matters. Close the door properly.
The employment and business market is smaller than you think.
That “bad employer” you are cursing today may be the client you need tomorrow, the referee a recruiter calls next week or the partner in the consortium you want to join next year.
Dr Request Machimbira is the executive director of Proficiency Consulting Group and the International Wellness Institute. For feedback, email request @proficiencyinternational.com or phone +263772693404.
