Online Reporter
Coach Molly
Let’s talk about confidence.
Not the loud kind that pushes through crowds or floods social media with curated poses.
Not the kind that shows off to cover up insecurity.
I am talking about real confidence.
The quiet, calm kind. The type that walks into a room and does not need to shout to be heard. The kind that says, I am here, I am enough and I belong.
That is the confidence we all deserve.
The good news? It is not something you are born with it is something you build.
So . . . what even is confidence?
Confidence is knowing who you are, showing up as that person and doing so with grace. It’s not perfection. It’s not fame.
It’s not being the loudest at the table or the sharpest dresser in the room.
Confidence is doing your best and not crumbling when your best does not get applause.
You see it in the woman who walks into a kombi in town, dressed simply but neatly, shoulders back, eyes forward.
She pays her fare, says “Maswera sei?” to the conductor, and does not shrink when all eyes turn. That is confidence.
Confidence is not reserved for the elite, the extroverted, or the influencers.
It is a skill.
One that can be learned, sharpened and carried into every space you enter, whether that is a Zoom interview, a lecture hall, a family function, or a Harare CBD hustle.
Think of confidence like a three-layer cake:
1. Grooming: The first impression
Let us be honest, we do judge books by their covers, especially in Zimbabwe, where looking presentable still opens doors.
But grooming is not about looking rich. It is about being intentional.
Clean, ironed clothes (yes, even jeans) Moisturised skin (please, let’s end the reign of ashy elbows)
A tidy hairstyle or haircut that makes you feel like you have got your life together.
You don’t need designer clothes.
You just need consistency.
Reality Check: People take you more seriously when you look like you take yourself seriously.
From job interviews to meeting the in-laws grooming matters.
2. Etiquette: The way you carry yourself
Etiquette is not just about fine dining and finger bowls.
It’s about respect for yourself, and for others.
Greet people properly. Good morning costs nothing. Make eye contact when someone’s speaking.
Know how to excuse yourself politely.
Don’t interrupt. Don’t overshare. Don’t oversell. Etiquette is about presence and emotional intelligence.
It’s about making people feel safe and seen in your company.
And in a country where community still matters, this stuff goes a long way. Quick Fix: Next time you’re at a networking event or even a casual hangout introduce yourself confidently, ask questions, and listen more than you speak. Its quiet power.
3. Confidence: The energy that glues it together is the inner glow. The energy that follows you when you walk into a room, whether you’re wearing thrifted fits from Avondale market or a tailored suit from Borrowdale. Real confidence is quiet but undeniable.
Its the decision to: Sit in the front row when you usually hide at the back Share your opinion without apologising first. Show up even when you feel underqualified. Confidence says, I’m not perfect, but I’m prepared. It whispers, I might be scared, but I’m showing up anyway.
How do you build it? Like any skill — through reps, not luck.
Here’s your Confidence Gym Starter Pack:
Mirror work — Look yourself in the eyes and say: I belong here. I bring value. I’m enough. It might feel awkward at first. Do it anyway.
Posture check — Shoulders back, chest up, chin level. It instantly shifts how people see you and how you see yourself. Voice training — Speak slower. Speak clearly. No rushing, no mumbling. Command attention without forcing it. Style experiments — Find clothes that make you feel like a 10/10 on your own scale. Whether its a fresh cut, a pop of colour, or clean sneakers let your outside reflect your inside.
Localise the glow-up — Zimbabwe has its own rhythm. Our culture values modesty and excellence. Whether you’re greeting elders, pitching a startup, attending church, or just vibing at a brunch spot in Avondale carry yourself with intentionality.
Let your confidence make people curious, not uncomfortable. Let your presence speak before your words do. Power Move — Master the art of greeting in different spaces. A firm handshake, a respectful mangwanani, or a nod with eye contact can be the most underrated flex.
Your weekly challenge — This week, I want you to walk into every room like someone invited you even if they didnt. Own your space.
Smile a little more. Speak a little clearer. Look people in the eye. And when you catch yourself thinking, Who am I to be here? Ask yourself instead: Who am I not to be?
Coach Molly is a Confidence, Grooming & Etiquette Coach passionate about helping Zimbabweans present their best selves in life, work, and relationships. Catch this column every Saturday in The Herald newspaper for real-talk guidance, small wins, and stylish glow-ups rooted in our culture.
