Pregnancy, the aftermath no one warns you about

There is joy, celebration, jubilation, flowers, friends and well-wishers all around you after the arrival of your little one.

But as soon as you reach home and settle in the comforts of your room with your bundle of joy, reality strikes you.

And the word “joy” flies out of the window in no time. Yes, that is something no one tells you about and a lot many other things. So, wondering how your life changes post-pregnancy? Here it is:

You become a zombie: Less or no sleep makes you one. You sleepwalk through the day and stay wide awake the entire night. If people expect sanity out of you, God bless them.

You still look pregnant: You might even question yourself, ‘Did the doctor leave the other one inside.’ Well, no he didn’t, deal with it, you will still look preggy. Do a few exercises with your baby to lose weight.

Dark circles refuse to budge: No amount of make-up will ever help you hide those dark circles, a by-product of around-the-clock nursing, newborn tantrums and post-pregnancy blues.

Stretch marks look more horrible: You saw those pink lines on your belly before, but you were busy lathering cocoa butter and talking to your womb. Post pregnancy they look horrible on shrunken belly, a reason why you start hating your body. So if you don’t want to hate your body, prevent stretch marks during pregnancy.

You have worse days than your periods: Post-pregnancy bleeding called lochia is worse than your periods. You learn it when you experience it. And they don’t stop after five days.

Your sexual appetite goes for a toss: Whether it’s a C-section or a vaginal birth, you detest sex, not just for a few days or weeks, but for months at a stretch.

Some women might not have sex even up to two years after childbirth and this is no joke!

Your mood swings are at the worst: Sudden outbursts and emotional tears don’t stop after delivery. Postpartum mood swings are dangerous as pregnancy blues.

Your shoes never fit you again: Your shoe size changes permanently. No, you don’t suffer from edema now. But the muscles in your feet never get back to their original shape. No massage or pedicure can help.

Same goes for your clothes: You expected to fit into your designer jeans right after your pregnancy? Really, did you? So, nobody told you that your uterus takes its own sweet time to get back to shape. However, it will never go back to its pre-pregnancy state ever.

You lose hair exponentially: You become the perfect candidate for the “before” picture of a hair loss ad. It is tough to predict whether all your parlour visits and protein hair treatments can help you be the face of the “after” picture.

Your breasts turn to be sensitive: You detest a touch, a brush of your own fingers or any contact for that matter other than your baby’s suckling.

You don’t want to be a mom: Whether you admit it or not you hate being a new mom when the baby is crying, colicky or poops 15 times a day.

You hate people when they are sleeping: Because they are getting their eight-hour shut-eye due while you are attending to your baby.

Visits to the restroom are more frequent: You have no control over your pee (no it’s not just towards the end of your pregnancy, bit of it is lifelong).

You are hungry all the time: Especially, for nursing moms. But you have no time to eat. It’s a toss-up between sleep and grabbing a bite. — Online