Online Reporter
OF late, it seems our former socialite-in-chief, Gilbert Nyathi — of the Nyathi Family fame — has been feasting on humble pie. Well, let us rewind a bit, shall we? There was a time when the Nyathis were the poster children for the Zimbabwean Dream.
Their story was a fairytale, a real rags-to-riches saga that tugged at our heartstrings so hard we all fell in love with their story. From South Africa, they beamed into our phones with skits that shone a harsh spotlight on desperate lives.
We cried. We laughed. We sent money. And oh, how the Lord blessed them! In the blink of an eye, they had a manager, decent dwellings (no more leaking roofs!) and were enjoying rock star status. It was indeed a meteoric rise. With fame came fortune. And with fortune, unfortunately, came big-headedness.
Suddenly, the Nyathis were untouchables.
The manager, sensing the hot air, wisely packed his bags and left. And what happened next? The proverbial fall from grace. Now, fast-forward to last week.
During a live social media discussion with Sisi Melly and the usual suspects, Gilbert dropped a bombshell that left us all slack-jawed. He was allegedly attacked by thieves (allegedly, because the story sounds fishy).
And now, the man who once claimed to make a fabled $25 000 a month could not afford a $150 medical scan.
But wait, it gets better. In another conversation with Moreboys Munetsi, Gilbert revealed that for the entire month, Facebook paid him a grand total of . . . drumroll, please . . . US$20. mYou got to be kidding? Ge! Ge! Ge! That is not even enough to buy a data bundle to complain about the data bundle. Either their skits now suck so badly, or they were living a lie all along.
Which one is it, Nyathis? Did the algorithm betray you, or did the truth finally catch up?
This is a cautionary tale, dear readers. A lesson for all the youngsters out there who see these “socialites” living large on Instagram and think, “Eish, I want that life!”
You see the flashy cars, the rented mansions, the borrowed chains — but you don’t see the bank balance that reads US$20 for 30 days of hustling.
Now, with their tails between their legs, the Nyathis have come back with their biggest bowl yet, asking Zimbabweans — the same people they probably blocked for asking inconvenient questions — to help them out.
But here is the question: Where are all the “fans” now? Where are the “admirers” and “sympathisers”? It seems even sympathy has an expiry date. And this, my friends, is why the United Kingdom and Australia are trying to keep kids under 16 off social media.
Not because they hate fun, but because they don’t want children to think that a US$20 month is “goals”. They don’t want them to feel pressure to be fake-rich while being real-broke. To Gilbert, Mai Juju has this to say: If you can’t afford painkillers, maybe it’s time to stop taking “socialite” as a profession. Just saying.Ndikoko!
