Online Reporter
Transformation with Mildred
During my childhood, I occasionally found myself pretending to be ill to gain an advantage. Once, it was to avoid chores; another time, it was simply to receive the attention that any sick child gets in a big family. Strangely, despite faking it, I eventually ended up genuinely feeling unwell.
Years later, as a young adult working far from home, I experienced a similar pattern. My colleagues and I were subjected to incredibly restrictive working conditions without any days off.
The best we could manage was half-a-day on Sunday afternoons. As my longing for home deepened, I concocted a story: I lied that my maternal grandmother had unexpectedly passed.
This garnered sympathy and the time off I desperately needed. Truth was; my grandmother had died before I was born.
As I prepared for my long-awaited journey home, a surprising heaviness enveloped me. Instead of the excitement I expected to feel, I felt overwhelmed with a profound sadness. I realised then that I was mourning my grandmother.
I had unknowingly cast a shadow over my own emotions and for quite some time, I could not pull myself out of grief.
Coming to think of it, most of us have crafted a lie at some point — maybe not about an illness or a death but by telling ourselves we are not good enough, not qualified enough, or that we will never amount to anything.
Some of us buy into the narratives that assert we come from a poor background and are destined to remain that way. Or perhaps we convince ourselves that we deserve to suffer due to past mistakes.
From an early age, society bombards us with messages about what we should be or how we should look. Social media amplifies these ideas, presenting curations of perfection that are often unachievable.
Whether it’s idealised body images, distorted success stories, or definitions of happiness, these external expectations become benchmarks against which we measure our worth.
These lies often whisper that we are not smart enough, not attractive enough, not happy enough . . . We have repeated them and lived them to an extent that they have since become second nature; we have convinced ourselves that they are the truth.
What is worse is that they lead us to a cycle of self-doubt criticism and inadequacy. Like my faked grief, we carry the weight of the negative emotions and they drain all our vitality, leaving us feeling timid, defeated, miserable and anxious.
And yet psychology reveals that our words shape our beliefs, and our beliefs in turn create our reality.
You cannot rise above average when you continuously speak defeat into your life. Why don’t you instead, flip the narrative: tell yourself that you are a winner, unstoppable, resilient and made for greatness.
Your body will believe these affirmations just as readily as it embraces lies, and, as a result, you will begin to feel strong and successful. This shift will draw the realities that align with your positive belief into your life.
Key to note is that every individual is a complete package of experiences, backgrounds and dreams. Our uniqueness is not a burden but a beautiful and essential component of our journey. Our thoughts too, perspectives, emotions and potential are each distinct and valuable.
Instead of downgrading ourselves based on flawed comparisons, we should harness our uniqueness as a source of strength — embracing who we are. We are diverse and there is absolutely no need for setting hierarchies on worth.
It is time to dismantle the lies that shackle us with doubt and feelings of inadequacy. Each one of us is equipped with resources; strengths, talents, experiences that contribute to the rich fabric of our identity.
We can therefore reshape the distorted truths, often brought about by societal pressures and find our true potential.
In a world that has programmed us to think and say negative things, let us choose to stand by the truth about who we are, whose people we are and what we can do.
Our authenticity has the power to reshape own narratives, spurring us forward as we move towards fulfilling our great destinies.
For feedback contact Mildred Mutize on [email protected]/ +263773637284
