Andrew
I RECENTLY almost laughed my lungs out on being favoured with a video of a young girl who was screaming hysterically as she sought to run away from her own shadow.
The young lass almost passed out on seeing her shadow right next to her even when she thought she had successfully flung herself off harm’s way.
So pregnant with meaning is the 30-second Tiktok video that yours truly could not help, but make it the subject of today’s instalment.
True to the video, there are countless characters who do not like the images they see whenever they look themselves in the mirror.
So unhappy are the characters with their images that they can do anything in the world to present themselves differently.
However, that quest is not without challenges.
Some women would rather let their husbands leave for work hungry than be seen by their friends serving the father of the house sadza with dried kapenta in the presence of friends.
“Munosva maenda henyu nenzara shewe pane kuonekwa neshamwari dzangu muchirikadabvura nematemba,” I was once told by my sister-in-law when her friends arrived just before she could serve me with food.
It only took the intervention of my wife who then suggested that I could take the meal in my bedroom.
It is not unusual to receive incessant calls from colleagues seeking to borrow your phone, suit, car and cash whenever they are due to attend a funeral, wedding or public gathering so that they look chic.
“Ingondisotawo nesuit kana vhuzhi yako ndimbobudikira munandi kumuchato wakulez vangu,” you hear the guys saying.
In my prime, I once borrowed a television set from a friend when my then girlfriend, who is now my wife anyway, was coming for a visit with her aunties.
There are some people who are so embarrassed with their families that they introduce lovers and friends to strangers passing them off as their real parents and siblings.
“I told a certain boy off when he came trying to introduce his girlfriend to me lying that I was his mother.
He must instead improve his mother and leave me alone.
People must work hard to improve themselves in the real sense and look after their parents and not go about lying to people,” one workmate who preferred anonymity told this writer.
Her view however, differed with that of Mr Pomerai Nzarachirombo of East View who said he was enjoying free booze from guys who wanted him to pose as their father.
“All I want is a nice time and I will not say anything to the lovers. I only encourage them to stay well and respect one another before demanding my booze,” he said with a naughty smile.
As I commit pen to paper gentle reader, some characters go to the extent of hiring video vixens or some women of tantalising beauty to attend public functions with so that they appear as if they are straddling on the fertile crescent.
There are scores of people who are saddled with insurmountable debts which they accrued while throwing unnecessary lavish parties for friends in the city.
“I want my party to be the talk of Harare. Make sure you slaughter a fattened bull for me so go and invite all gossipers and give them a bottle of whisky each so that they go about talking about me,”
I heard a certain bloke saying at a recent beer party.
“Kusvikira rinhi tichinzvenga mimvuri yedu, kusvikira rinhi?/Kusvikira rinhi, uchinzvenga mumvuri wako, kusvikira rinhi?/Kusvikira rinhi tichinyara mimvuri yedu, kusvikira rinhi?/Zvaingori tsika nditsikewo, nemimvuri yedu tsika nditsikewo/Dada nerudzi rwako, chimiro chako nedzinza rako/pembedza mudzimu pwere dzigotevera” sang the legendary national hero Oliver Mtukudzi in this classic called “Tsika Dzedu,” which emphasises that one can never successfully run away from their shadow.
Living a lie is costly, let’s be real.
Inotambika mughetto.
Online Reporter