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Fadzayi Maposah, Correspondent
I know that there are traditionally no weddings and roora ceremonies in November, the month of the goat, Mbudzi.
Come December there will be wedding after wedding as people wish to finish off the year having moved from being single to being married by the time the New Year begins.
Congratulations are in order for those who are planning weddings and will be changing not only their marital status, but their whole lives.
To those who are still waiting for things to happen, all the best, keep hope alive. Life has no formula or one size that fits all. You never know, take one day at a time.
When people plan a wedding, they put so much energy, effort, time and money into the plans. They want to always remember the wedding.
There is attention to detail regarding every aspect of the wedding. What will be worn on the day, is carefully selected. It has to be excellent. There are colour codes. One does not just pitch up at the wedding wearing whatever they want, you can be bold enough to do it but you may spend the whole day feeling out of place.
There will be probably that one person who will ask you if you did not get the invitation that specified what colours should be worn. This is just for the guests, for the wedding party there are high level specifications that must be met.
I am reliably told that now in some instances, the bride and the groom make time to inspect what the grooms men and bridesmaids will be wearing.
There is the issue of the wedding venue. Now this can become a controversial issue in some families as the family members feel that there is much money that is paid for the venue as opposed to what was received by the in laws as roora.
The venue has to be spot on. It will set the tone for the whole day. It will have an effect on the pictures that are taken as it is captured in the background. The venue will also inform what kind of entrance the wedding party will make.
Closely linked to the venue is the sitting arrangements for the wedding ceremony and also for the reception. There will be earmarked a spot for the gifts. A gifts table can be made available.
Other people even tell you the kind of gifts that they are expecting, they simply provide guidance so that they are able to fully appreciate your gifts! Now in planning there is provision for different pay methods, you will go to a wedding and you will be shown swipe machines so that you can simply swipe your monetary gift.
They will even make provision for a mobile phone in case you want to use the electronic money transfer options. You will even get a receipt. Smile emoji.
What about the food? There will be much concentration regarding the food. For Zimbabweans generally, an event is judged as being very good when food is in abundance. Food cements relationships. We even have a saying regarding the importance of food. “Ukama igasva, hunozadziswa nekudya”. Loosely translated it simply means that relationships are incomplete without eating! Remember the functions that you have been to and the importance that is attached to food. Food for thought.
Transport is closely looked at. The transport has to ensure that people get to where they need to be on time and comfortably. Time is well managed. One does not just do as they wish. There is strict guidance. What about the flowers, the décor? The public address system? The music, the playlist all well-organised. There is a carefully selected Director of Ceremony or Directors who put the necessary pace to the programme. There is so much work to be done. I may have even left some of the details that you consider important. I am not gifted in that area! Please bear with me! Wedding planning is demanding. No wonder it has become a booming business.
Weddings though only last a few hours. The work that is out into the few hours maybe months or years old.
The same attention to detail for an event that just lasts a few hours does not seem to be applied to other life milestones that are critical. Some couples do not seem to plan their families with the attention and effort that they planned their weddings.
They have no clue how many children they want to have. They do not know when they want to have these children. There are no provisions for the baby`s arrival that are accumulated with the zeal that they had their wedding. So much is left to chance.
Whilst in the past they hunted down `the` venues, they are very relaxed about where they will stay and raise their family. Then one wonders, where is the priority? The wedding guests are the priority of lavish spending against the children that are born after the wedding.
Some children never get to experience their parents spending the way some guests did in a few hours. As adults at times we have not been responsible enough to give our children the attention that we give to the outside world. The children that were brought into this world by adults who made deliberate choices to do so are treated like party gate-crashers. Sadly even at some weddings, children are served last.
Today Zimbabwe joins the region in celebrating World Children`s Day. Children drawn from Botswana, Malawi, Mozambique, Namibia, South Africa, Zambia and Zimbabwe will meet and celebrate just being children.
Children need adult support, sacrifices and commitments so that they enjoy being children. Without adults planning for their welfare and upkeep, just being children becomes a burden. Children need access to education, adequate food, housing, sanitation and protection from exploitation. Their needs are the responsibility of adults who should safeguard them and their childhood so that their future is protected.
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