adminZachary Aldwin Milkshake in the Boardroom
I had a conversation with a friend the other day about depression. Not the full-on clinical depression but stuff more at the start of the cycle of emotional downfall. We went back and forth for a while talking about why depression starts and kicked a few ideas around. Maybe it’s because social media takes snapshots of people’s lives at big moments and leaves out all of the mundane, diligent, normal stories in life. So we compare ourselves to fake ideals and images. Maybe it’s because we get let down by people who claim to be loyal, loving and kind — only to realise that their intent was only just to use you and cause you pain.
Maybe it’s because you have dreams in your heart about what you want to become (and many people think fame will fill the gap) and when you don’t see your path headed in that direction your hope turns into depression.
Then as your world begins to darken you struggle to see any more good in it.
My mate looked at me and said. “I can see why one would fall into depression. My worker, Ngozo, has none of that. He’s the happiest guy in the world. He has four cows, two goats, 10 chickens and a bicycle. He used to have pigs but they died of disease.”
He continued: “I ask myself sometimes. Why is it that Ngozo has two shirts and a small patch of land and doesn’t want anything else in life that we would call major?
“He’s content. He actually transports both his daughters to school by bike. Then he rides back and farms his land and is thrilled with his life. He wants nothing else whatsoever. But he doesn’t have access to social media or what many consider modern conveniences.”
We’ve been driven as a society by convenience and access. We don’t want our national parks and wildlife to be touched, but if hotels get built there we will use them because its more convenient than sleeping in a tent. We complain about people having access to us 24/7 but if the technology exists we will use it to contact others.
We don’t want people stalking us or nosing about in our lives but if the technology is there to connect with more people we’ll use it.
We want to watch less television but if it is on we’ll watch it.
We want to eat healthier but if there’s a cheap fast food joint there we’ll use it.
We want to be content, but if someone has something better than us across the street we’ll want it.
Convenience and covetousness are two of the great driving forces in our lives. I have watched the degeneration of teenagers over the last decade from a group of youths who, while going through the anxieties of an adolescent crisis, used to go cliff diving and create adventures for themselves to a group of snivelling piles of humanity who cannot bear to leave their cell phones alone for more than 27 seconds in case they miss something. Cellphones are more convenient, but they have changed the behaviour of the world – and not necessarily for the better. Convenience is not the best measure of progression.
Covetousness has snuck up on us more and more in subtle ways. That picture of your friend on the beach in Durban that he uploaded to Instagram (even the “insta” part in the name implies instant convenience), how did that make you feel?
Were you happy that he got the break he deserved, or were you secretly itching inside that you could be there?
It used to be that you had to wait till the Joneses next door actually drove their new car into their garage to get upset, now you can check out the 50 new cars your circle of “friends” on Facebook got as end of year bonuses. Instant news, but instant chances to think you are doing worse off than someone else. Instant chances to be depressed.
As an entrepreneur, businessman, or human being what drives you?
Why are you doing what you are doing?
Could people say that you’re the happiest man on earth?
Now I’m not saying we should all go back to cycling everywhere but sometimes we have to stop looking around us at other people’s lives and focus on we’ve been called to do period.
Not comparing, not wanting what we don’t have but being content with four cows, two goats and pen full of chickens. Comparison will always make you depressed.
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