Five strategies to resolve conflict

is that conflict is natural and no one should be perplexed when it happens.
Many of the conflicts that people experience are rarely a matter of principle, in most cases it’s those small things that are not properly communicated.
Most organisational conflicts centre on budgetary, methodology, remuneration, appointment and resource allocation issues.
All these sources of conflict are not beyond solution. The most dangerous situation is when conflict arises on the very foundations of the organisation likes the vision, objectives, mission and values.
These are the backbone and its conflict in these that usually result in business partnerships breaking up or other directors resigning.
It’s difficult to unite or form a team that believes differently about the organisation.
Regardless of how grave the conflict maybe, with honesty, sincerity and transparency it can be solved.
Researchers Robert Blake, Jane Morris, Ralph H. Kilmann and Kenneth W. Thomas identifies five approaches to conflict management that I believe will be helpful to you regardless of the level or cause of your conflict.
They identified avoidance or withdrawal as the first approach. This is whereby conflicting parties retreat from the situation and avoid either the subject or the conflict situation.
It works sometimes but it does not solve the conflict. Personally, I do not prefer this route.
It causes the conflict to deepen and when it explodes after a time, it can be so deep that it is difficult to resolve.
When people are in denial that there is conflict, it is difficult to communicate and this causes the problem to deepen.
This is rife in boardrooms and marriages and relationship. Much discontent is hidden and people pretend everything is well until a certain time they explode when they feel enough is enough.
This is when people begin to remind the other party of the wrongs they did last year and vice versa.
The image of the conflict becomes too easy, the conflict records too long and the situation difficult. Conflict should be spoken about and ironed out.
The second approach that the researchers identified is that of competing or forcing.
In this approach, one party tries to impose its idea of a solution or overpower the other.
One party view and act in a win-lose manner. This situation results in rebellion or resentment.
This is typical of conflict between a boss and a subordinate where the boss believes he is always right and does not want to yield to the subordinate’s viewpoint.
This is also typical of relationships where there is no balance of power like some marriages and other relationships.
The overpowered party may give in but with disgruntlement and sooner or later they revolt.
They may keep a record of all the losses and these provide ground for further conflict. This does not solve the conflict therefore.
The third approach identified by the researchers is that of accommodating or soothing.
This approach is quite progressive. Each party searches for areas of agreement, placing value on the relationship over the resolution.
The relationship becomes so important that the resolution is not a matter anymore.
This brings some fairness. Many a times, the differences are exaggerated and the level of conflict also.
The effects of it are exaggerated as well and people become more defensive. Such a scenario makes a resolution to be viewed with suspicion.
This is different from emphasising similarities, many a time you realise your points of disagreement are nothing compared to those of your agreement both in value and magnitude.
Sometimes when people begin to fight they forget what brought them together in the first place, the relationship and its dangers. Emphasising agreement avoids polarisation and defensive behaviour.
The fourth approach identified by these research is that of compromise. A point of convergence is identified; each party loses something to find a fair solution.
This idea of compromise brings some satisfaction to the warring parties. This brings about a resolution and makes sure the conflict is resolved.
It brings about the win-win situation and both parties go home satisfied that their need has been met and the situation sealed.
The last approach identified by the research is collaboration in confronting or problem solving.
In this approach, people are frank with each other in a win-win approach without fear or prejudice.
A high value is placed both on the outcome of the resolution and on the parties’ relationship.
Information is freely exchanged and areas of conflict freely explored and worked through.
Each party must be willing to change its position and move toward the other, compromising and sacrificing until a solution is reached.
To achieve this, however, people have to be open minded, accepting different views and feelings, removing all preconceptions and ideals and listen objectively without judgment.
This approach does not only resolve the situation at hand, it ensures a healthy relationship between parties even after and avoid the recurrent of the same conflict.
Hope you were inspired. See you next week as we explore further how we can be better people and better leaders.
l Pascal Nyasha is a motivational speaker and leadership coach. He is the author of the inspirational book, “Reaching New Horizons”, and founder of The Leadership Clinic, the training and development organisation focusing on personal and staff development for organisations. Call: 0773 003 912 or email: [email protected]. Connect with Pascal on Facebook.