For retreat is something I never desire

By Blessings Matsetlo
I took a look at that direction
Only to find nothing inspiring
I looked the other direction

There was nothing admirable

I touched the ground

But was too hard to pinch

I tried to go high up and reach the sky

But gravity couldn’t keep me that high

I tried to run as fast as I could

And my legs kept tripping time and again

The only option is to go slow

For retreat is something I never desire

I rendered myself heavy

But was ashamed to be blown by a slight breeze

I tried to work as hard as I could

But tire couldn’t stop humiliating me

I even tried it in church, prayed for this

But Lucifer was always blocking my ways

I cried so loud

But the yell wasn’t loud enough to be heard

Or the ones who heard it were not sympathetic

I tried it on the streets as a beggar

But found out there was someone with more troubles than I had

I was so proud of my intelligence

Not knowing there is so much I’m not aware of

I even told my friends I was the best

Yet forgetting there are so many ahead of me

I looked for just an ordinary job

But no-one was ready to pay me

I tried to be corrupt

And the cops became my friends of the time

Now who should I pay for my happiness?

Who should I pay for my transition?

Who will find himself willing to pay me if I work?

Who will hear me whenever I cry?

Who can borrow me extra strength to resist tire?

How can I be rooted to the ground to resist the blow?

Who can lend me a parachute to stay long in the air?

How fast should I run?

For retreat is something i never desire.