Manicaland men open up in frank engagement with First lady

Tendai Rupapa Senior Reporter

THOUSANDS of men, including chiefs, from Manicaland Province on Sunday gathered for First Lady Dr Auxillia Mnangagwa’s male engagement programme to enhance their search for medical attention on time, and fight drug abuse, gender-based violence (GBV), and child marriages, among many challenges bedevilling communities today.

The lively Manicaland engagement was the eighth such event to be held by Amai Mnangagwa, who is taking the programme to all the country’s provinces.

The engagement is held in an interactive manner, giving men an opportunity to air their views and ask questions in areas in which they needed clarity.

This comes as the First Lady has scored a first by forming community-based committees to fight drug abuse across the country as she lives no stone unturned to fight the scourge.

In Manicaland, the mother of the nation immediately made sure committees for women, men, boys, and girls were formed to work with the police, her office utilizing the toll-free 575 in her office and the minister of State’s office.

Before the engagement, Manicaland Provincial Affairs and Devolution Minister Nokhuthula Matsikenyere, who was representing First Lady Dr Mnangagwa, asked for permission as a woman to discuss with them. The First Lady’s male engagement sessions, Minister Matsikenyere said, were part of her efforts to leave no place and no one behind as it had been established that men rarely visited hospitals, neither did they open up when confronted with challenges.

Said Minister Matsikenyere: “Amai goes around with many programmes like fighting child marriages and empowerment of women through courses and projects. This shows concern for the welfare of the people and for that we thank her very much. Today she has brought a programme in which she is not leaving anyone behind. She has brought a programme for men, unlike the usual case where we focus mainly on women and children.

“Men, Amai is asking how you are in the homes with your families? She has heard that most men do not come out in the open even in instances when they are stressed. This is why Amai has said despite all that you come through, we want men to open up and speak so that this may help someone.

“Men fall sick and do not visit hospitals. They however only visit hospitals after the disease would have intensified. We heard about prostate cancer. If prostate cancer is diagnosed at an early stage it can be cured unlike when you delay in seeking treatment. This is why Amai has decided to have this programme for men. She heard also about domestic violence, which is largely perpetrated by men. But what would have caused this? Men in most cases fail to report domestic violence perpetrated against them, Amai wants to know the reason why. This is why Amai is saying let us discuss all these things that we come across in the homes which lead to domestic violence,” she said.

The minister said men must always speak out when confronted with challenges as this helped find immediate solutions to the many and varied challenges they face.

“Today we want to hear from men and the chiefs that which is fuelling domestic violence, drug abuse, and child marriages, We also heard the police speak about drug abuse and in the homes our children are leading in drug abuse. What is causing this? If you look out and investigate you find out that children whose mothers are beaten up end abusing drugs because they will be escaping the challenges they see their mothers going through. If a mother is troubled, this also affects children.

“So we want to discuss this and see how we can assist one another. We have cases of child marriages where some children go out to get married to run away from domestic violence in the home. They see it better to find a boy or an old man to stay with away from the violence.

“But that is not the only cause as some parents betroth our daughters to elderly men while some elderly men want young children. Who can tell us what causes this?”

In response, men attributed cases of domestic violence and child marriages to their spouses.

An elderly man left the gathering in stitches when said he who pays the piper calls the tune and that women were supposed to be put in line.

“I paid lobola for my wife and she has to dance to my tune because I paid my money. If she starts misbehaving, she will leave me with no choice but to whip her into line. She then rushes to the police to report domestic violence yet she is the one who would have caused it,” he said boldly.

One of the discussants said: “Women are being problematic in the homes. Some women are beaten up for likening their husbands to dogs or calling them useless. This makes us very angry for being told such bad words by women. The biggest perpetrators of domestic violence are women.”

This dovetailed with the views of another contributor who said men always resorted to violence in response to their wives’ attacks.

“I see that we are being blamed as men yet we cannot shout as they do and we usually keep quiet. The bible says a woman must be submissive and under the husband but the powers women are getting these days hiding behind equal rights are making them take us for granted and we lose our fatherly authority. We are afraid of reporting abuse to the police because society will label us as weak. No man would want to be called weak. So we have no power to report such cases,” he said to applause.

During the interactive session, Mr Kudakwashe Farirai said women did not treat their parents and in-laws fairly.

“True, women usually attach importance to themselves and their relatives yet mine will be treated as useless. So women must value our relatives as well and this causes challenges and the raising of voices in the home. Laziness is also a factor as most women do not want to work. They just want to be fed by their husbands without helping in looking after the family. This is a great challenge. We are happy that Amai brought projects for our women while encouraging them to work hard. These women spend most of their time at neighbors’ houses gossiping without bathing or cooking for us,” he said.

“Your daughters-in-law Amai are insulting us as dogs and cats yet when we want to leave the home to hunt for those who respect us, they won’t allow us. They call us dogs, isn’t a dog can have many partners,” quipped another gentleman.

Another man raised a heart-rending issue on child marriages.

“Thank you for coming to hear our concerns Amai. You have done well for us. In the home, our daughters are being married off by their mothers. Our wives want these perfumes and skin-lightening creams such that they arrange older men for our daughters for the love of niceties. You end up hearing that the child is pregnant and has gone to be married without the father’s knowledge,” he said.

Mr Emmanuel Makunike said at home, violence is caused by women.

“When we seek to discuss the challenges in the family as a couple you lose out because they talk too much. Sometimes they pour water on us and I see that my respect has been lost and this is how violence begins,” he said.

Mr Peter Sanyahokwe added that violence was always caused by disrespectful women.

“Violence is caused by women in the home, they lower your esteem. You tell her wht you want and she refuses. Amai, thank you for engaging us we are grateful. We hope varoora venyu Amai have learnt and will correct their mistakes. Another thing is you try to counsel a daughter as a father and you are told off by the mother. You have no place advising my daughter, counsel the boys and this makes our children get married before completing their education,” he said.

A youth said children are misbehaving because they have witnessed their parents doing bad things in front of them and end up copying that.

Chief Mapungwana paid tribute to the mother of the nation’s intervention and other stakeholders for helping reduce cases of domestic violence which had been on an upward trajectory.

“Thank you Amai for coming to us this day. On gender-based violence as chiefs, we stand by you and we are saying no to domestic violence, no to drug abuse, and no to marrying off children before the time is right. Most crimes in our courts about 50 percent were on GBV, but the trend is changing because of your intervention and vision Amai,” he said.

The police called for everyone to play a role in fighting drug abuse which was widespread across communities countrywide.

“Statistics have shown that people from nine years going up to 65 are using drugs. There are many drugs that are being used which include mbanje, mutoriro, dombo, guka, mangungunde. We are troubled by these drugs. People are also abusing ecstasy tablets which are used at vuzu parties which are now known as mujolo parties. There is also a drug called LSD which is used by young children and some drugs which make one light-skinned. Let’s unite and fight drug and substance abuse,” the police said.

Speaking on the same occasion, Mrs Failess Matemba from the Office of the First Lady praised the mother of the nation for going beyond the establishment of the national gender-based violence 575 toll-free line to engaging fathers and young boys across the country.

“To date, the First Lady has travelled to eight provinces and intends to travel to the remaining two provinces. Dr Auxillia Mnangagwa’s vision is to use a family-oriented approach to counter the scourge of domestic violence within households by engaging the male populace who are also leaders of the family setup as stakeholders in the fight against gender-based violence. The national gender-based violence call centre is operated directly from the First Lady’s office and the call centre agents are multi-lingual operators who are simultaneously trained counsellors. Statistics gathered received to date point to the male gender being the majority perpetrators of gender-based violence,” she said.

The Acting PMNCHO for Manicaland Province Dr Tendai Nyafesa said Manicaland recorded 11 454 sexually transmitted infection cases in men in 2020 and 11 158 cases in 2021 showing a slight decrease.

“Non-communicable diseases in the province especially among men whose carefree attitude toward their health has proved to be detrimental to their health. Poor lifestyle choices in engaging in risky practices such as smoking and substance abuse put men at increased risk of developing NCDs. Chief among the NCDs affecting men are diabetes, hypertension, and prostate cancer just to mention a few. A total of 158 new cases of prostate cancer were recorded in 2021 and during the first semester of 2022, we have recorded 83 cases of prostate cancer. These figures are too high to ignore and action needs to be taken to protect men. We are glad that Amai you are encouraging men to visit hospitals for regular check-ups. Men remain a very critical stakeholder in this regard,” he said.

Representing National Aids Council chief executive officer Dr Bernard Madzima,Acting Nac provincial manager for Manicaland Mr Hlatywayo Sibert said NAC and the entire community of the response to HIV in Zimbabwe was pleased to be associated with the First Lady whose intention was to accelerate gender equality and sexual reproductive health and rights which were critical to the attainment of the 95-95-95 targets and ending of Aids as a public health threat by 2030.

“As the national coordinator of the response to HIV, our mandate involves coordinating prevention and treatment programmes and ensuring that there is harmony and alignment with national policies and strategies including the Zimbabwe National HIV and Aids Strategic Plan 2021-2025.

“We are pleased with the achievements the national response has recorded over the past decade which include 90-90-90 by 2020 targets. Now more than any other time before there are people who know their HIV status and who are receiving antiretroviral therapy to curtail advanced disease progression and achieve viral load suppression,” he said.

Dr Madzima said national HIV incidence in Zimbabwe had dropped from 2 percent in 1999 to 0.24 percent in 2020 while prevalence had also dropped from over 25 percent to 11.58 percent during the same period.