Self-control important

Self-control or self-regulation is a tool given to man, by Nature, to keep in check the tremendous power within humans. Without self-control, this inner power resembles a storm which can destroy life and property. The Book of Proverbs says that a man without self- control is like a city broken into and left without walls. Self-control provides the balance, which helps man, build, rather than destroy.

Many of the troubles faced by humanity, today, are grounded in lack of self-control. Conflicts which stalk humanity, corruption that distorts systems, the lack of fairness and transparency, which weaken governance systems, and so forth, are all rooted in lack of self-regulation. Self-regulation is an ongoing inner conversation which we all have to engage, just as a thermostat, to regulate the varied flows of energies. One writer says that self-control frees us from being prisoners of our feelings.

Daniel Goleman in “What makes a leader” describes self-regulation as the ability to redirect disruptive emotions and impulses. He includes trustworthiness, integrity, and comfort with ambiguity and transformation, as hallmarks of self-control.
Disruptive emotions and impulses are part of our physiological functioning. The tempers, anger, fears, temptations and hatred are some examples of these disruptive emotions and they come and go. A well developed self-control mechanism is able to identify these as disruptive and manage them, accordingly. An immature regulatory mechanism will believe that these emotions are good for processing and acting on, resulting in the many dramas we see in organisations.

Governance systems are burdened by these disruptive emotional and impulsive behaviours. Normally, people do not plan to exaggerate profits, or dip into company tills, take a fat pay cheque when the company is sinking or take bribes. Rather, opportunities present themselves and infant self-regulatory systems in leadership, accept these impulsive moments as good opportunities. Organisational leadership which can take a moment to reflect on integrity, when such opportunities arise, will most probably make good decisions on behalf of the organisation.

Sadly, in our world today, such leadership does not receive due recognition. Instead these leaders are labeled, as aloof, cold fish e.t.c.
Temperamental leaders, who throw tantrums, and are noticeably in bouts of bad and good moods, are the ones regarded as charismatic and powerful. When the whole organisation freezes because the boss is in a bad mood, there is thrill among followers as they try to unpack and speculate on these negative emotions. The boss, in turn, feels all powerful and that they are in control of the organisation. When the boss is excited, it is expected that the whole organisation should be excited with him/her.

The importance of self-control in governance is that, leadership, which can control its emotions and feelings, is able to create a stable environment of fairness and trust. Organisational politics and infighting are kept at minimum. This, in turn, increases productivity. Calm bosses create a calm organisational atmosphere, which no hothead employee would want to disrupt. When uncertainties visit, and they find a balanced and calm leadership, they can not rock the boat.

This is not to say that self-regulated leadership does not feel angry, or have bad moods and emotional itches. They do, like everyone else, but they can manage and control them, so as not to affect decision making. Leadership which can control its emotions can easily adapt to change. When technology changes, they are not perturbed, but will simply learn how to manage the new technology. Mergers and acquisitions as they happen will find leadership ready to adapt. Such leadership instills confidence in people and organisations.

Self-control is also necessary to manage positive emotions. For instance, success is good and gives out positive feelings. If people celebrate this success for too long and without limits, they may forget to work for the next success, and could cost the organisation. Positive traits, such as, kindness, compassion etc, should also be subjected to self-control. Too much of kindness, may weaken leadership or systems. Too much of compassion could cause over dependence.

Without self-control, man resort to animal instincts. Governance under such impulses can be disastrous to humanity. Perhaps, this is what John Maynard Keynes appreciated when he described that most economic activity results from rational economic motivations and “animal spirits” or non-economic motives. His view of the role of government was that it should set limits to prevent over indulgence into animal spirits, and put its attention to encourage compliance with set laws, rules, and procedures.

Literature describes animal spirits, in modern day economics, as the restless and inconsistent element in the economy as well as the special relationship people have with ambiguity and uncertainty, which tends to lead to paralysis or incredible confidence and energy in decision-making and risk-taking.

In management language, self-control is one of the components of emotional intelligence, along with others, such as, self-awareness, motivation and empathy. No matter how technically skilled and intelligent a leader is, there is need to develop emotional intelligence. Technical and other intelligence are deemed as threshold skills, which only serve as entry qualifications. In order to thrive as a leader one needs to develop emotional intelligence.

This can also be considered through; the fact that man is made up of body, soul and spirit. The body, represented by physical intelligence and skills, makes up only one third of a human. The other two thirds can not be touched, but felt. This means that feelings make up two thirds of man, yet most training and development concentrates on physical skills. Feelings can not be ignored, they have to be managed. We all get angry, just as we all feel fearful or exited sometimes. Feelings are important and are part of man, but they have to be regulated, so as to bring about a balance in all three components; body, soul and spirit.

Ambiguities, opportunities and uncertainties present themselves, every once in a while. Change is a normal course of life in an institution. Self-regulated leadership knows what to do, at such times. The ease, with which leadership can harmonise with change, creates confidence and comfort in place of uncertainty. Even if such leadership does not know what to do, it gives out an aura of peace, enough to quiet storms. One can almost bet that such leadership does not abandon ship; they are not selfish or individualistic. Rather, they have the capacity to create space to reflect and think.

One success motivational speaker says that, a leader trained in self-control, is unique in that they expect challenges, and actually look forward to overcoming and forcing their way through these difficulties. Self-control is a learnt trait. Very few people are naturally, calm and balanced. Many of us we have to learn to control and manage anger, joy, excitement, happiness, fear and other emotions that we feel during times of uncertainties. It is a lifelong process. One must desire to develop this trait; it can not be forced on anyone. Self-control is a great organisational and leadership virtue, which could save many institutions. Leadership training and development curricula should incorporate self-control, along with other components emotional intelligence. In schools children should be encouraged to practice and develop this ability to manage emotions. Organisations should engage in going personal training and development for leadership to develop capacities to self-regulate and manage emotions. This is how I think leadership could instill confidence in organisations.