Tinaye Agere
WHENEVER the bartender calls for last orders, the old man cringes, yet he neither drinks nor smokes in the dingy bar where he is a regular.
All he does is perch in a corner and gaze at the ceiling.
He is never tempted to contribute to animated conversations on soccer and politics, yet he never misses a day at the club.
But the old Smith’s case is not isolated.
At Chitubu Beerhall in Glen Norah, there is also an old man who would rather sleep in the bar than go home.
He is very much at peace watching other people quaff the wise waters, smoke and dance to music, yet he never indulges in any of these activities.
These two gentlemen represent millions of men out there who are henpecked and nagged by their wives so much that they would rather be away from home most of the time and only come back when it is time to sleep.
“Huya ndikutaurire; mukoma, huya ndikutaurire, huya ndikutaurire, kana ndozofa ini. Mukadzi haanditeerere, anoita zvese zvaanoda, nhasi onditonga pamba pangu here. Chinonyenga chinohwarara, chosimudza musoro chawana,” sang the legendary Marshall Munhumumwe in the song “Ndatove Muranda”.
True to the singer’s lyrics, some homes are prisons for most men, with their wives acting as slave masters, who dictate everything.
There are cases where getting married to some women is akin to committing a crime.
They routinely deny their husbands food, conjugal rights and a voice.
As a result, some children enjoy more privileges than their fathers.
This why some young men at times vow never to marry.
“I do not think I will ever marry in my lifetime. Never! What I see happening to my uncle embitters me. He is denied food and heckled by his wife at every turn. Even at church and some gatherings, he is directed on what to say.
“His wife also never washes his clothes and fills the whole house with her relatives who are in need of assistance at the expense of my uncle’s personal welfare,” one bloke told this writer.
Another young man said he has witnessed his uncle being slapped in the face by his wife.
“Some women generally do not have respect for their spouses. I have seen my uncle being slapped in the face by his wife, who has also made it a point that he received no visitors. When we want to give my uncle money, we do not do so in the wife’s presence because that will be disastrous. No one at this home respects my uncle at all,” he said.
You see, dear reader, there are some women who routinely visit their husbands’ workplaces to ridicule them and make demands that are out of this world just to embarrass them.
Men who are under the tyranny of their domineering wives are difficult to deal with.
All decisions or plans are usually overturned the moment their wives get wind of them.
Some men are made to sleep alone as their spouses routinely attend funerals, including those of their exes.
They do not even have the decency to tell their husbands where they will be going.
One of my acquaintances woke up to find his car missing after his wife had lent it to her former boyfriend to attend a funeral in Zvishavane.
Unfortunately, our society does not allow men to open up, so they usually bottle up their problems.
Love, respect and trust build the foundation of strong marriages, but these are non-existent in some unions.
Inotambika mughetto.
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