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Lynette Manzini : Review Correspondent
With a swollen face, reddish eyes and apparently wounded hands, Dorcas Ndlovu aged 20 hides herself in her home. She has just received a thorough hiding from her husband who leaves her to nurse the wounds alone as her poor kids watch helplessly. Despite this Southern African nation enacting the Domestic Violence Act in 2007, Ndlovu has become one of the hundreds of women here who have continued to suffer violence in the secrecy of their homes at the hands of their violent spouses.
Ndlovu and thousands other women who often fall victim to domestic violence here say they are aware of the law which can protect them, but have not dared make use of it. As a result, in the privacy of their homes, many like Ndlovu testify, the law has not helped to protect them.
“If I were to report him everything would crumble before my eyes in the home as I am unemployable since I am uneducated. How would I feed my kids?” Ndlovu said.
Although her husband has beaten her on several occasions in their four year marriage, Ndlovu said she has never reported him to the police and has kept the issue confined to close relatives.
“The two people who know this issue other than me are my mother and aunt (tete). Their advice is always the same “shingirira ndizvo zvinoita imba (be patient that is how marriage is).
“For as long as I depend on my husband, I will not fathom the energy to have him sent to jail simply because he has beaten me,” said Ndlovu.
This piece of advice is not peculiar to Ndlovu’s mother and aunt alone, but is common among women who endure violence.
Ndlovu, a mother of two now, says she will rather brave the beating than to go and face her father who accused her of disgracing the family by falling pregnant while still at school.
But for many other ill-fated women like herself, without taking action to confront the challenge, nothing has changed.
This is despite Zimbabwe utterly criminalising domestic violence as espoused in its Domestic Violence Act.
Precisely, the Act defines domestic violence as any unlawful behaviour which results in death, or the indirect infliction of physical abuse, sexual abuse and emotional abuse among many others.
The Act does not only save to protect women like Ndlovu, but even their male counterparts, this despite men often bearing the brunt of domestic violence in silence, ashamed to make police reports about their woes.
Such is also the case for Adam Musandu, hailing from Chitungwiza, a town about 25 kilometres South-East of Harare, the Zimbabwean capital.
“I am beaten almost daily
by my wife, but reporting to the police amounts to embarrassing myself to the whole nation as it is tantamount to washing my
dirty linen in public,” Musandu said.
For either spouse, concealing their suffering at the hands of their violent partners is not panacea to their woes, this according to legislators.
“Whether for men or women, minimising their chances of being victims of domestic violence should be countered through empowerment.
“Violence either against men or women is a reality although many victims are women because many women are dependants, which at times lead to scuffles with their spouses when negotiating for money,” a member of Parliament said.
“Unreported cases are as a result of upbringing. Zimbabwe is a patriarchal society and naturally victims will not open up on domestic violence matters. If my mother was to be beaten by my father today she would not tell it to anyone let alone report it,” said the parliamentarian.
Such is the mentality that drives the egos of several men who still beat up their wives.
“If you get home and find your child playing with a knife then tell your wife to make sure the child does not play with dangerous objects, but this continues after advising her several times, a beating will send the message home right away”, said a Harare man who asked to remain anonymous.
The man’s remarks resonate with the 2014 Multiple Cluster Survey (MICS), which revealed that 37,4 percent women and 23,7 percent interviewed thought
that a husband or partner was justified in hitting his wife in at least one of the following occasions: goes out without
telling him, neglects the children, argues with him, refuses to have sex with him and burns
food.
Gender activist and director of the Zimbabwe Young Women Network for Peace Building, Grace Chirenje said shifting of mind sets should become top priority in order to curtail GBV.
“Domestic violence and behavioural change is about shifting mindsets. If we are to be successful about this, we all need to unlearn whatever we have held dear in terms of human relationships,” Chirenje said.
“The stereotypes, socialisation and ways of being have to be transformed so we see a new way of existing in our relationships; so once we have this respect for each other and we will report any violation of what we seem the norm. This norm is saying no to domestic violence,” added Chirenje.
But for many GBV victims like Ndlovu and Musandu, it may be a bit longer before they realise the importance of tackling domestic violence head-on.
Online Reporter