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As the year has come to an end, it is clear that quite a number of enemies of this great nation of ours have been humbled and it is really an easy task to name and shame them.
I must hasten to say it was a tightly contested race to the Hall of Shame I am sure your guess is as good as mine as to who grabbed the biggest cake of shame . . .
Joice Mujuru
Throughout the year, we were constantly threatened that there is a very big political party called People First led by one Joice Runainda Mugari Mujuru, the disgraced former Vice-President of this glorious country, which was going to overrun Zanu PF.
Sometimes the threats seemed so real and you could almost touch them, especially when the Daily News, NewsDay, Standard and ZimInd turned themselves into commissars for a non-existent party.
Time and again, full page advertorials, written in extremely very good English and surprisingly signed by Joice Mujuru herself would be thrown here and there in the private media either to deny an allegation or to sell a replica 1999 MDC manifesto which was now rebranded as Build.
But the year has gone by and there is no People First to talk about, no Build and no more money for full page adverts in a struggling private media that could only do so much as to take a donkey to the river – although it could not make it drink the Gamatox water.
Joice Mujuru wins the race to the 2015 Hall of Shame because she promised a gullible minority a party without people. She could even be second and third as well in the race.
Rugare Gumbo
Although Joice Mujuru was the face of the imaginary party, the rabble-rouser called Rugare Gumbo of the Nhari Rebellion was the loud-mouth constantly disturbing our peace through the private media.
His sell-out antics make Morgan Tsvangirai look like a small boy.
Madyirapazhe blabber-mouthed his way straight into the 2015 Hall of Shame.
With a bit of luck, he might come first in 2016.
Didymus Mutasa
After his expulsion from Zanu-PF and the loss of his Parliamentary seat, Didymus Mutasa withered into a very sad and pale shadow of the former Security Minister.
The fellow hit hard times although now and again he would mumble something inaudible to the private media.
The fear that he had instilled in and around Makoni district first wilted into laughter and then slowly into sympathy.
By the end of 2015, Nyati had become an old, braying donkey well-suited to the Hall of Shame.
Morgan Tsvangirai
There can never be a Hall of Shame without the veteran sellout called Morgan Tsvangirai.
He was, expectedly, in his usual reactionary mode throughout 2015 in a desperate bid to try and remain relevant despite his opposition tent crumbling right around him.
He had to deal with an adversary in the form of his former secretary-general Tendai Biti, who constantly entertained himself by taking a swipe at his former boss.
By year-end his place in the Hall of Shame was assured as even Nelson Chamisa – who first accused him of seeing shadows and then later bluntly insinuated that he was weak and anaemic – started seeing what the electorate has always seen: Morgan is washed up.
Morgan Tsvangirai continues to hold onto the crumbs of what is left of the opposition.
Even rumours of a “coalition” with Joice unsettles him because he wants to remain the big daddy in the little pond of a dried up Save River.
Obert Gutu
It is always painful to hear Obert Gutu speak. Whenever he opens his mouth, we cringe before a single word comes out.
The chap reminds me of Learnmore Judah Jongwe, whose catastrophic demise was like a Shakespearean tragedy.
Obert, like Learnmore before him, has terribly bruised his reputation and ego trying in vain to defend the failed leadership of Morgan Tsvangirai.
The result as often as always is that he finds himself in a rage.
All we hear when he speaks is his frustration. Is Obert the best the opposition can do by way of a spokesperson?
Margaret Dongo
She is a spoil sport. She spoiled it for People First. Sisi Maggie should just quit politics. She wants recognition. So we will give it to her. Welcome to the Hall of Shame.
Itai Dzamara
There are times in our youth when we would run away from home because things would not have gone our way.
But as sure as the sun sets, with tails firmly tucked between legs, we would be home for the evening meal.
Even nowadays, a husband may risk not sleeping at home for a day or two but as sure as the sun rises, he grits his teeth and comes home to face the music.
From wherever you are reading this, Itai Dzamara, please come home and enjoy the Hall of Shame.
Bruce Wharton
He came with an air of superiority and went back to the US engulfed in shame.
He claims he is still searching for Itai Dzamara yet both of them must be wondering how best to effect regime change in Zimbabwe since diplomatic office and occupying Africa Unity square fell flat.
Dubulaizitha!
Online Reporter