Moffat Mungazi
Weekender Reporter
A BITTER family feud has erupted within a Buhera family pitting children against their UK-based mother over the erection of their late father’s tombstone and unveiling ceremony.
The dispute reached a boiling point on May 25, when the children, led by Takudzwa Maonde, decided to erect the tombstone of their late father, Alex Maonde, who passed away in May 2024.
The move was in defiance of their mother, Fortunate Gamanya, who had insisted that the process be delayed until August, when she planned to return to Zimbabwe, and oversee, both the tombstone erection and unveiling ceremony.
However, the children had grown weary of the prolonged delays and cultural tensions that had been plaguing the family.
They argued that the grave had become an eyesore and source of spiritual discomfort, not only for the immediate family, but also for relatives and villagers under Headman Nemhari in Chief Nyashanu’s area.
Village head Aleck Maonde, the younger brother of the late Alex, confirmed the discord, and expressed disappointment over the escalation of the situation.
“This matter is between our sister-in-law (Fortunate Gamanya), and her son, Takudzwa, as well as our brother’s other child from a previous marriage.
“Our brother passed away in May last year, shortly after returning from the UK, where he had stayed with his wife for just a year. Since then, we have not done a memorial service for our late relative. This is, not only disrespectful, but also culturally unacceptable,” he said.
He explained that the family contacted Gamanya in April, requesting that she returns to Zimbabwe in May for the ceremony to distribute the deceased’s estate, and initiate the final cultural rites, including the erection of the tombstone.
However, she allegedly refused, citing ill-health.
“She simply does not want to return home. She has made numerous trips to Zimbabwe, solely to lay wreaths on the bare grave, while her late husband’s estate remains untouched.
“The grave has become an open wound in our hearts. She instructed her children not to dictate what to do to her, citing her maternal authority, but they are grown and understand our traditions,” he said.
He said the situation had deteriorated to the point where Gamanya obtained a peace order against Takudzwa, and barred him from visiting their Hatfield home.
“It is deeply painful to witness. She no longer wishes to collaborate with the family. Instead, she prefers to work directly with the headman. Perhaps she can conduct the necessary rites with the headman’s assistance.
“We have waited patiently and given her ample time. However, there comes a point when the dignity of the deceased takes precedence. We could not continue to watch as weeds overgrew our relative’s grave while nothing was being done. As a result, we will no longer be involved in the distribution of his estate when she eventually returns,” he said bitterly.
The family’s decision to erect the tombstone without Gamanya’s consent was not without consequences.
In an interview, Headman Nemhari, whose jurisdiction includes the gravesite, said he summoned the family to his court for erecting the tombstone without his nod.
“The family is currently not in good favour due to this matter. I first learnt of it when they approached me outside court, and I advised them to follow formal channels. However, they proceeded to erect the tombstone without obtaining the necessary approval,” he said.
He confirmed convening a hearing last Friday where the family, represented by village head Maonde, acknowledged their wrongdoing.
“I will deliver my verdict next week. They were aware of the implications of their actions, and they will be dealt with accordingly,” he said.
The drama has sent shockwaves through the community, with some members sympathising with the children’s actions, while others supported Gamanya’s desire for control and order in honouring her late husband.
Bayai Nyarugwe, another family member, described the erection of the tombstone as a necessary act of respect and defiance.
“No one can prevent us from erecting a tombstone on our brother’s grave. We are not strangers. His children provided the cement, and they wanted to pay their respects to their father. Why should we deny them that opportunity? Simply because someone married into the family does not grant them ownership of everything,” he said.
Although the tombstone ceremony is uncertain, the family remains resolute in their decision to proceed without Gamanya’s presence or permission.
“She has made her choice. She refused to be present when we needed her, yet she wants to dictate terms from the UK? That approach will not be tolerated here,” said Nyarugwe.
Efforts to contact Gamanya and Takudzwa were unsuccessful, as their mobile phones went unanswered.
Online Reporter