adminChipo Mazarura
Zimbabwe Ezekiel Guti University
Date rape, which occurs when the offender has sexual intercourse with a person whom he or she is dating against his or her will, is an issue that is real and destroying especially the lives of many youths daily.
A recent study revealed that one in five women in college experiences sexual assault. Studies also show that students are at the highest risk of sexual assault in the first few months of their first and second semesters in college.
Date rape is robbing youths of their future, yet sadly such an issue has not been given much attention, possibly because of inability to distinguish or because people do not want to believe that such a thing exists.
Force can be used or a person can be made to believe that engaging in sexual intercourse with a person she is dating is a must, resulting in her reluctantly agreeing.
There are also cases of one of the people on a date has their drink spiked with drugged, which results in one losing consciousness and being raped.
There is a great need to emphasize both on paper and practically the fact that date rape is a crime and the offender has to face the music no matter what, and for justice to prevail. I think it really starts with the survivor of such a crime, coming out and speaking up against the crime and outing the perpetrator.
However this is easier said than done because many victims of date rape tend to see no problem at all due to the great love they have for their “partners”. Even when they know that they are being affected in so many ways, they tend to believe that love conquers all the feelings of hurt, especially if the offender brings financial benefits.
When such unpleasant experiences take place, young people especially those in institutions of higher learning do not speak to parents or lecturers.
They confide in and seek help from their peers who may also think that the experience is normal so that in most situations they continue to suffer at the hands of their “lovers”, who are supposed to shepherd them and to protect them.
The sense of guilt seems to overshadow the need to report such a crime when it occurs. Most young people feel guilty about being victimized, especially when the crime takes place at a guy’s place. They think and blame themselves that they are responsible for their suffering since they are the ones who were at the wrong place. Therefore, instead of reporting the matter they find escapism by blaming themselves thereby increasing feelings of depression and social anxiety. These feelings are aggravated by the fear of being stigmatized, blamed and mocked by fellow peers and the larger society.
Date rape like other types or forms of abuse, destroys the life of its survivor in so many ways thus it is of uttermost importance that the issue be addressed throughout the country including at primary and secondary schools as well as tertiary institutions in orer to prevent it, while helping those who have already been affected by it.
It is extremely painful to be betrayed and harmed by someone whom you trust and someone who should always come to your rescue when you are in trouble.
When such betrayal takes place, the victim loses her pride, confidence, sense of belonging and even self-awareness.
The event leaves her with scars, physical, psychological and emotional that may never heal and she will live in fear, perhaps for the rest of her life and she will be afraid to go out, learn and get to know the real world. She will be reluctant to network with others because everyone, in her eyes, will be a betrayer.
All these effects can be worsened by lack of support from the family and the society. It seems that a lot of people especially parents seem to believe that only girls who are reckless become victims of date rape and people seem to associate survivors of such a crime with girls who date older men. They do not realize the depth of the damage that they cause. They also do not realize how much the victims can be affected by those views.
Negative attitudes and perceptions of such a crime force many victims to remain quiet, even if and when they are greatly affected and when they are in need of help, hence those attitudes should be modified in order to help survivors in accessing professional help and coping with the situation without alienating herself from society. The way society perceives this issue will also help to prevent future crimes.
Online Reporter