We were duped in land deal

Mudzimba

Dr Chisamba

DEAR Amai, I hope you are well. I am a vendor and I work hard for my family. My wife is a full-time housewife and we are blessed with two children — a boy and a girl. The eldest is five and the youngest two. It is not easy being a tenant, especially with young kids like mine. We learnt that several headmen were selling land in rural areas, so we decided to save some money.

At times, we went without a decent meal just to meet our target. We raised US$500 and went to pay it as deposit. The headman was, however, not amused because he wanted us to pay twice as much. We pleaded with him and he showed us our stand, but he wanted us to settle the bill within two months.

To cut a long story short, two other people bought the same stand and now we cannot prove we paid for it because we were never given any receipts. We have tried to go and speak to him but his security guys are blocking us. Amai, how can we get our money back?

Response

Dear writer, thank you for writing in. I am well and thanks for asking. I wish you had written to me earlier, before you lost your hard-earned money. You trusted the headman because of who he is in the community. How can you pay such an amount without demanding a receipt?

You should have asked one or two people in the village how procedures of similar transactions are undertaken. I am sure other people have fallen victim, too; you could have been warned. For your information, these headmen are not allowed to sell State land. Go and report the matter to the police. Do not keep wasting your resources by going back and forth. I would be happy to hear from you again.

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I feel like quitting job

Dear Amai, I am employed as a helper. The couple I work for does not have children of their own. They contacted me through my aunt, who goes to the same church as these employers. I was very happy to finally get a job in Harare.

What bothers me most is that arrangements were changed after I had worked for just a fortnight. From Monday to Friday, I work at the house of my boss’ mother. It is crowded and there are people of different ages — toddlers, teenagers and adults. It is a family home and everyone is entitled to visit the place.

I work at my boss’ place on Saturdays and rest on Sundays. I cannot cope with the workload. It is a lot for one person. I cannot complain because of the relationship that exists between my aunt and my boss. I was considering packing and leaving. I feel short-changed. Please, Amai, advise me.

Response

Dear writer, thank you very much for writing in. First and foremost, never consider absconding. It is not a good way of communicating, although you feel short-changed. Your boss is to blame; she should have told you the scope of your work before you started.

The other thing that is unclear is you were not informed on whether this is a permanent arrangement or not. As much as you respect the relationship between your aunt and your boss, you should speak to her and get some clarity. It is your right to know what is going on in your life. I advise you to do this as respectfully as possible. I would be happy to hear from you again.

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Hubby is upsetting me

Hello, Amai. I am a big fan of your column; I follow it weekly. I have been married for 10 years and blessed with two sons. My husband and I are both gainfully employed and doing well. I try as much as possible to always trust my spouse. He is a chief executive officer. I understand he works with female staff, and the same applies to me.

I work with many male counterparts. For the past two months, I have noticed that he, at times, calls me by his secretary’s name. This makes me very angry. I told him that there was no excuse for this and he apologised, but he continues doing the same. Amai, could this be a red flag or not?

Response

Dear big fan, thank you very much for your letter. I understand your anger and how it feeds into your suspicion. I do not think any spouse would be happy to be called by someone else’s name, especially if it is someone you know and has a close association with your spouse.

I do not want to jump to conclusions, but let us not leave any stone unturned for now. Have a candid talk with him once again but come up with solutions. Instead of calling you by name, he can use your child’s name, for example, Mai David.

Some commonly used terms like honey, babe or sweetie may also suffice. You can use this as a stopgap measure, then later stick to what suits you best. Marriage is a game of trust but still keep your ears to the ground. Please, keep me posted.

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