adminRay Bande Senior Reporter
Nothing is more shocking, emotional, or final than the death of a loved one. Facing the death of someone you love – a child, a spouse, a parent, a close friend – is one of life’s most difficult experiences. Your head spins with so many thoughts, feelings, and emotions. You can’t grasp that you’ve had your last visit, your last conversation, your last meal, and your last holiday with your loved one.
Your mind is flooded with things you wish you had said or done. You want to say, ‘I love you’, one more time, and you want to hear it said to you.
Your warehouse of memories is filled with fond and painful remembrances, and you are holding tightly to that treasured collection of fading photographs. Naturally, you don’t feel ready to say goodbye or to deal with the grief that’s overtaken you.
Simply put, you can’t prepare for the death of a loved one.
Such is the grief that we find ourselves in following the untimely death of a father, a brother and a friend – Mr Mathew Kamushinda Tondoya.
Indeed, your death – Mr Tondoya – sudden as it was in the wee hours of last Monday morning, to those who were privileged to know and associate with you, not only left many hearts aching bus shook us all to the core.
Your death makes us angry. We are not saying you were not supposed to have died, but you had hope, you had a vision, you were a source of inspiration to many in every sphere of your life.
You specifically had an illustrious career in education, made a name for yourself as an elite educationist and icon in your own right, with notable leadership and administrative expertise and experience.
Your integrity, passion and sincerity stood out and undoubtedly inspired everyone you came in contact with both in every sphere of your life.
Indeed, your death shook us to the core!
It is with a deep sense of shock that we learnt of your death.
I know and fully understand that the evil that man does lives after them but the good are often interred with their bones but it will certainly be easy for most of us to recall the good about you as it outweighed the bad.
No matter how serious a situation could be, Mr Tondoya, you always saw a lighter side.
I vividly recall the humorous jokes that we used to share each time we met in town let alone during our recurrent trips to provincial and national schools soccer tournaments.
That you breathed your last during the same week that national hero Cde Sikhanyiso Ndlovu died left me imagining hearing your voice from your final resting place saying, ‘Look Ray, the national flag is half mast me and Cde Ndlovu!’
Indeed, Mr Tondoya you had this great sense of humour that I will always remember you for.
Humility is one quality that is so essential for a person to be regarded as a true leader and Mr Tondoya, you had this attribute by the number. Pomposity was never one of your traits. You never looked down upon the less privileged neither did you ever make your material possessions a subject of discussion in meeting places that you frequented.
Such was the high degree of humility, modesty and humbleness that summed up your character, Mr Tondoya.
You were a man of the people.
To your beloved wife, children and fellow associates, this article was written to help them make sense out of what appears to make no sense and to point you towards hope even as they are experiencing the darkness of death.
As they deal with grief, their emotions race and their thoughts are scattered and in the middle of this confusing and hard time, let us find the strength to celebrate the exemplary life that Mr Tondoya led.
May your good soul rest in eternal peace, you were indeed my father, my brother, my friend!
Online Reporter