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One afternoon, while helping my ten-year-old with his homework, I found myself scolding him for failing to solve a simple math problem. How so frustrated I was!
After a while, he looked at me and asked, quite innocently,
“Mom, when you were in Grade Four, was this very simple for you?”
I was about to say “Yes, of course!” when my conscience stopped me. Suddenly, a memory surfaced of my teacher standing before our grade four class, exasperated, “I don’t know how else to explain this. We’ve been doing fractions for two months and you still don’t get it!”
I smiled at my son and admitted, “No, it wasn’t easy for me either.”
As I later reflected, his question was simple yet profound. How often we judge others through the lens of our current strengths, forgetting that we too once struggled! We forget that growth takes time. We evolve through patience, experience, and the understanding and guidance of those ahead of us.
Instead of criticizing and comparing others, how about supporting and understanding them? Remember, the strengths and wisdom we have today were not always ours – we developed them through failure, effort, and time.
Others may still be walking the path we’ve already travelled. That doesn’t make them weak. It makes them human.
Without doubt, our wisdom, strength and abilities are shaped by the lives we’ve lived. Some lose their parents early and must grow up too soon; others lose them after decades of stability. Their pain is different, their lessons unique – yet both are valid.
Life’s diversity is its greatest beauty. We don’t need to think alike, believe the same things or behave in the same way to live harmoniously. What we need is compassion – and the willingness to see value in one another.
I’ve seen countrymen in foreign lands unite and build thriving businesses. I’ve seen families turn small ideas and projects into international enterprises. They didn’t succeed because they agreed on everything. They succeeded because they chose to see beyond their differences and harness their shared strengths.
Let us not cultivate division by magnifying what separates us. Instead, let’s nurture what binds us; unity, love, and understanding. That’s where true growth and lasting success begin.
Too often, we create invisible frames and expect others to fit neatly within them. We expect others to think, talk, and act as we do. When they don’t, we become frustrated.
Recently, I listened to a local pastor preaching with great passion. Yet much of his sermon was spent criticizing another congregation whose doctrine differs from his. As I listened, one thought echoed in my mind:
What if the same strength and energy we use to tear others down were used to build something good instead?
Imagine how much stronger, kinder, and more united we would be; bound by love, not by hate.
It reminded me of a Form One mathematics teacher introducing new concepts. When he teaches equations, for instance, he doesn’t ridicule the primary school syllabus that once taught the students to simply say “it can’t”.
Instead, he builds on that foundation. He knows growth requires patience, not condemnation.
Religious leaders – and indeed, all of us could learn something from that teacher. When you believe someone is lost, the most powerful response isn’t attack or ridicule. Those only deepen wounds, creating further divisions. The true response is to live and teach your truth with grace and love.
Because love speaks the one language every heart understands.
And this lesson goes beyond religion. We see the same patterns in workplaces, communities, and everyday life. We spend so much energy proving others wrong that we forget to look for shared ground. Yet our differences don’t have to divide us – they can enrich us. Diversity of thought, belief, and expression is what makes humanity beautiful.
Let’s choose to build, not break. To love, not label. To teach, not taunt.
Because in the end, love unites and that is what the world needs most.
Mildred Mutize is a speaker and writer passionate about inspiring growth, personal development, and authentic human connection. For feedback and engagement contact her on [email protected] / +263773637284.
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