Online Reporter
Cuthbert Mavheko, Correspondent
MEMBERS of the Gwabalanda Seventh Day Adventist Church were recently invited to a Renewal of Marriage Vows Ceremony at the Gwabalanda SDA Church.
A message that was sent to church members via “Gwabalanda Announcements” — a WhatsApp group- read: “You are invited to the Renewal of Marriage Vows Ceremony at the Gwabalanda SDA Church as couples celebrate their love and commitment. Come and witness the beauty of renewed promises.”
“Renewal of Marriage Vows Ceremonies are the most joyous, fun-filled occasions, filled with joy and happiness. They act as a reminder of why a couple chose to get married in the first place. The ceremonies reaffirm a couple’s love and commitment to their future life together.
“In a marriage vow renewal ceremony, couples remember the promises they made to each other on their wedding day — to be together in sickness and health ‘till death do us part’. This is also a time for married couples to thank everyone who has loved and supported them during their marital journey,” said one Gwabalanda SDA Church elder.
It is essential to understand that God created marriage as a permanent union between a man and a woman.
However, what is shocking, if not altogether alarming, is that many married couples facing difficulties, now view divorce as a parachute out of their marital problems.
This has seen married couples breaking up in large numbers. Official statistics show that Zimbabwe witnessed a staggering surge in divorce cases in 2024, with 3 214 cases recorded across the country, compared to 2 149 cases in 2023.
While these are staggering and sobering statistics, they are just a tip of the proverbial iceberg. Research shows that thousands more marital breakups are going unreported because scores of people in the country are customarily married, with no marriage certificates.
One saddening observation I have personally made since pitching my tent in the marital camp is that there are many couples who are married, yet strangers to each other in their own homes.
They live together, but are not really happy in their marriages. They stay together for the sake of their children, or for religious or financial reasons. But what should married couples do to have happy marriages in this world of broken homes and unhappy families?
One Gweru-based Christian marriage and family therapist, who has been married for 33 years, had this to say: “The most important key to marital success is commitment to the permanency of the relationship. Life is full of ups and downs, good times and bad times, triumph and tragedy. Marriages are tested by such difficulties. But that’s how marriages grow. Happiness in a marriage can be maintained if it is built on a strong foundation of mutual trust, loyalty, respect and affection.
“Happy marriages produce happy families and happy families create a healthy society. In our research, we found irrefutable evidence that successful marriages are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, love, respect and forgiveness.
“Married couples need to bear in mind that no one is perfect in this world. We are all imperfect human beings, living in an imperfect world. We all make mistakes. But learning to forgive ensures happiness in a marriage.”
He added: “If you have done something that has hurt your husband or wife, you should do one of the things that most married couples find difficult to do. You should admit that you have made a mistake and humbly say to your mate; ‘I am sorry, honey, I made a mistake.”
A humble apology will win you respect, help build a trusting relationship and enhance your own peace of mind. On the other hand, adoption of the attitude, “I will never forgive you for that!” is the fire that ignites marital squabbles, which burn the bonds of matrimony into ashes. The spirit of unforgiveness is one of the major causes of marital unhappiness.”
It is crucially important to state that God did not create us, human beings, and leave us ignorant of the laws and principles by which we should live in marriage and other human relationships. God established immutable spiritual laws that, if obeyed, will produce happiness and love in marriage as in all other human relationships. However, breaking these laws brings unhappiness and misery in marriage and other human relationships.
The Ten Commandments are God’s basic code, upon which all His laws — social, economic, civil and religious — hang. The Holy Bible shows that these Commandments are a perfect law (Psalm 19 verse 7).
While the Ten Commandments are impugned as negative and outdated by some misguided evangelists, the truth which must be told, without fear of criticism or contradiction whatsoever, is that these commandments are dynamic living laws.
They outline, in broad detail, how we can establish a close relationship with God so that we can have His guidance, help and blessings during this mortal phase of our existence. These God-given Commandments also outline how we can establish good relationships with others — our neighbours, parents, children, husbands, wives etc. I rest my pen.
l Cuthbert Mavheko is a freelance writer and theologian. He can be contacted on 0773963448 or 0775522095 or via email [email protected]
Bongani Ndlovu