adminproven recipes. Some will be quick to blame you for crimes you didn’t commit simply because you work with the public.
The same goes for sanitary engineers.
No one wants to do the job, but everyone comments about the irregular cleaning schedules, the stench and the absence of toilet paper.
Pre-school teachers are in this very same boat.
The moment young couples enrol their children, they expect the young souls to be able to count up to 10 and greet visitors in the Queen’s language within a week.
“It’s a good creche, I tell you. My son has been there for just a week and he now knows over 10 rhymes,” you hear these new entrants into parenting saying while getting a hairdo in one of the noisy salons that have mushroomed across town.
There seems to be an unwritten law somewhere that if a child can count up to 10, he is clever or is in the hands of a good instructor. Whether that is true or false, gentle reader remains a topic for another day.
Boxers too are not a lucky lot.
Imagine watching television during the prime viewing slot from about 6pm to 9pm only to be greeted by teasers of your father on the receiving end. Baba vachipihwa zvekwavo nyika yakatarisa.
Thank heavens most boxing matches on television do not always feature Zimbabweans.
Were it not so, then their children would be laughed at school.
“Haa nyarara apo iwe. Baba vako vakabuda vachizvindikitwa nemumwe murume paTV mauro,” their children would be told straight in the eye.
Sadly, Members of Parliament fit perfectly on this list of people whose jobs are in the public domain.
“Whatever your hand findeth to do, do it with all thy might,” reads the Bible. And the words ring true whenever what you do is reviewed by others. Paswera badza hapanyepe. That the Seventh Parliament of Zimbabwe dies a natural death at midnight today brings into perspective one character of that profession that people will always talk.
The dissolution of Parliament today brings the curtain down on five years during which legislators were in office and the electorate will be eager to review their performance to assess whether one was a legislator worth his or her salt or one was just in the august House to make up the numbers.
Hardworking servants of the people and numb skulls who were in the game for the cash and attendant benefits now await sincere progress reports for their deeds and misdeeds.
What they did to deserve honour and what they did not do not to be honoured is there for everyone to see.
As I commit pen to paper, the sword of joblessness is hovering over the heads of legislators who were elected into Parliament, but failed dismally to deliver on their election promises.
Airports they promised to build in their election manifestos did not materialise. Instead they had brushes with the law for squandering Constituency Development Funds or marrying other people’s wives.
For the past five years, some MPs had been in the news for all sorts of shenanigans, including bedding minors, driving without licences and boycotting critical meetings until their demands were met.
You can silence people but never stop them from talking, more so when they do it through the power of the ballot. Benzi rainwa muto vamwe vachida kuseva roona moto zvino.
People are talking and they will talk louder come election day.
Yours truly is reliably informed that aspiring candidates for Parliament and council posts are busy consulting the visionary and those with the spirits of divination to enhance their chances of making it in the elections.
Prophets are working overdrive as they battle to contain the current surge in demand for their services. It’s now not unusual in the ghetto to see chickens with beads on the outskirts of most ghettos as aspiring office bearers fight not to come second best. Huku dzakarasirirwa dzazara mumarukisheni hama we-ee.
Whether this works or not, is however, not the subject of this instalment, but people are doing it.
Confidence tricksters are not to be outdone.
They are preying on these desperate souls and wringing cash from them on the promise of drumming up support for them.
The wise are not eating vegetables these days.
They just fool an aspiring councillor into believing that they have powers to make them win and the rest is history.
Visits to streams on the peripheries of most ghettoes are now very revealing. There you find these people gunning for political office being washed in the blood of lambs to enhance their chances of victory.
Blackmailers are also making big bucks. They are being paid handsomely to suppress certain information that might present an aspiring MP in bad light and cost him votes.
Ini kunyarara kunyarara zvangu mumoyo zvizere,
Nhai shamwari, kuzvitaura kupedza nguva,
Kunyarara, kunyarara, kunyarara kunokunda kutaura, sang Alick Macheso in his song called Kuhwereketa.
True to the song, people have been quiet for a long time and it remains to be seen whether they will vote back to Parliament people who betrayed their trust.
To add drama to this whole Parliament thing, the forthcoming Parliament will not be without its fair share of drama.
What with news that DJs, sports personalities and characters like war veterans leader Joseph Chinotimba are in the race for Parliament.
Eric Knight, who was popularly known as the Knight Rider, is running for the Mbare seat and we only hope he won’t take people for a “ride” if elected into the august House.
Temba Mliswa, a celebrated fitness trainer is also in the race for Parliament.
He won the primary elections and if he makes it, he will be in Parliament after the harmonised election.
Chinotimba has been playing his cards close to the chest these days and recently won primaries with the aim of representing the wishes of the people of Buhera.
Let the people choose the leaders of their choice, but for now we expect DJs, sports personalities and Cde Chinos in the next Parliament.
Inotambika mughetto.
Online Reporter