Online Reporter
Fungai Muderere
IN African football, when the goals dry up, fans don’t just blame poor form — they blame juju.
From Europe to Africa, whispers of black magic influencing the beautiful game have echoed through the years. Who could forget the bizarre claims surrounding Didier Drogba? Some said he used African witchcraft to stay at the top of his game at Chelsea, even “jinxing” rival strikers?
Or how about the Ghana FA, which once hired a spiritualist to cleanse their team of curses before a World Cup qualifier? Even Senegal’s 2002 World Cup squad reportedly had players who refused to shake hands out of fear of spiritual sabotage.
Now the spotlight is on Lynoth “Sonjy” Chikuhwa, last season’s Golden Boot winner, who has mysteriously lost his scoring touch and people are starting to ask: Has someone bewitched him?
After 14 appearances this season for new boys Scottland FC, Chikuhwa has failed to find the back of the net. Nothing.
Not even a scrappy tap-in. This time last season, he was already on seven goals.
“Something is off,” said one Bosso fan. “That boy used to bang them in for fun. Now it’s like his boots are cursed.”
Across the PSL, the goals have vanished. Stats don’t lie:
λ126 matches played
λ27 goalless draws
λ51 total stalemates
And fans are fed up.
The recent so-called blockbuster between Dynamos and Highlanders ended in yet another drab 0–0 draw, prompting some supporters to shout:
“This is not football anymore, it’s ghost hunting!”
The only spark last weekend came from Kwekwe United’s Tafadzwa Muzenda, who bagged Goal No. 200 of the season in a 1–1 draw with Greenfuel. But even that celebration was short-lived, as Clive Rupiya struck back minutes later with Goal No. 201.
Meanwhile, the Golden Boot race is currently led by:
λWashington Navaya (TelOne) – 9 goals
λBilly Veremu (MWOS) – 9 goals
But Sonjy, last year’s king of the net, isn’t even on the scoreboard.
What went wrong?
Was it bad luck? A new system at Scottland?
Or something more sinister?
Insiders say Chikuhwa is working hard to rediscover his form, but some fans insist he needs more than just training drills.
“He must consult a prophet or a traditional healer. Something is not right,” another fan said half-joking, half-serious.
With the Castle Lager Premier Soccer League on a short break, maybe there’s time for some cleansing rituals.
Or maybe, just maybe, the strikers will come back with fire in their boots.
The fans want less black magic talk and more goals.
Top Scorers So Far:
λ9 – Washington Navaya (TelOne)
λ9 – Billy Veremu (MWOS)
λ5 – Reason Sibanda (Highlanders)
λ5 – Francis Mustafa (Yadah)
λ4 – Innocent Musiiwa (Bikita Minerals)
λ4 – Brighton Makopa (Chicken Inn)
λ4 – Thandolwenkosi Ngwenya (FC Platinum)
λ4 – Isasker Guribsab (Simba Bhora)
λ4 – Brighton Ncube (Highlanders)
λ4 – Charles Munyanyi (ZPC Kariba)
No more yawns. PSL, bring back the bangers!
