RUVHENEKO’S AGONISING PAIN

Talent Gore

RADIO and television personality, Ruvheneko Parirenyatwa, has revealed details of the agonising pain she experienced after losing her twin children last year.

Parirenyatwa, who had used a sperm donor to conceive, disclosed that she didn’t have a miscarriage, but lost the babies after their birth.

She said, understanding that time was not on her side, she had decided to have a baby using a sperm donor while waiting to meet her ‘Mr Right’.

She said the move was motivated by the discovery that she had fibroids.

She spoke about the lessons she learnt since the tragedy, and urged other mothers in similar positions, not to suffer alone.

“The first lesson is that not everyone one is happy for you, and the second lesson is to protect beautiful things because people ruin beautiful things.

“Just keep quiet,” she said.

When asked if she regretted sharing the news of her pregnancy on social media, Ruvheneko gave a yes and no answer.

“Yes, because it did not serve me long-term to have shared it, and no, because my story opened up so many women to reach out and talk about something that is otherwise never talked about.

“There is a Shona saying, Usafukure hapwa, meaning something like a miscarriage or losing your kids should not be talked about openly.

“Mine was not a miscarriage because I delivered and lost my babies.

“It’s a completely different experience because there was no blood and suddenly they were gone.”

Ruvheneko said her story drew the attention of many women who reached out to her to also share their experiences of loss.

She said this had made her connect with a lot of women on a deeper level than before.

“A lot of women reached out to me and we have connected on a level that I have never done before,” she said.

“I’m not talking about women on social media only, but people in my own circle, friends and family who I never knew went through such.”

She urged people going through a similar experience to find proper support to heal from the trauma.

“Don’t try to heal on your own. You have to find a way to heal. I don’t believe in keeping quiet about stuff like that,” she said.

“I don’t know why our culture says you shouldn’t talk about losing your child. Our culture also says you shouldn’t grieve or cry when you lose a baby, which is something mythical.

“For anyone struggling, there are professionals and there are also friends and family who you can reach out to.”