adminFredrick Qaphelani Mabikwa Successful Solutions
We have been blessed by technology. Communication is now very easy. I think those of us who grew up in the 80s and earlier know that we used to write letters to communicate. You would communicate in writing, buy a stamp and envelope and post your communication.It is different today as personal letters are now a thing of the past. Some of our children do not even know that we communicated through letters. With the advent of the mobile phone, communication has been made easy, even our grandmothers in the rural areas have phones and occasionally ask for airtime.
Everything has its advantages and disadvantages. Unfortunately this gadget has killed basic manners and courtesy in most of us. When we had the Nokia 5110 and the “Mango”, things were better then. Now with the smart phone, some manners and courtesy have gone down the drain. The culture of greeting people and dialogue is dead. People don’t care about other human beings around them because of the smart phone.
You enter an elevator, there are just two people inside, they don’t look up to greet you, they are on their phones. They may see you come in and if they don’t want to talk to you, they hide behind their phones. You arrive at a bus stop; there are only three people and again no one looks up to greet you, the people are on their phones. Indeed the city has too many people and you can’t go around greeting everyone, but where circumstances have forced you to be together for some time with fellow human beings, courtesy demands that you greet people.
The culture of dialogue is dying because of the smart phone. You go into a bus, you share a seat and at times the other person doesn’t even look at you; they are on their phone and with earphones on. You even try to talk to them, they can’t even hear you. Courtesy demands that when you share a seat with someone, you chat, so that you get to know each other and talk about common topics you both like. I have made many important contacts and relationships by talking to the next person in public places. When you talk to the next person, it makes the journey “shorter” and more interesting. Imagine sharing a seat with someone who is glued to their phone between Bulawayo and Harare. It’s even worse across the borders; you share a seat with someone who is not talking to you, but are on their phone all the way to Johannesburg.
Let’s have that culture of talking to people — that culture of dialogue is a very important culture. The family has also been hit by the smart phone. The culture of family time is also suffering. Evenings are family times for most families. After a long day at work and at school, the family sits in the living room and reflects on the day for some time before others take on home work and other things. Now you enter the living room and see the mother and children on their phones “chatting” and the father is fast asleep on the sofa. Family time is dying. Parents, the smart phone is slowly killing the culture of dialogue with our children and this is why when they have problems, they tell the parent next door.
Some people even take their phones to the dinner table. This is rude. I am reliably informed that even some couples, in bed, just face opposite directions and start chatting on their phones. Who are they chatting with? Also imagine how irritating it is to be driving people who are not talking to you, but are on their phones, including the one seated with you in front. It really feels like you are not family, but you have been hired to drive.
Parents normally send their children around to do some small chores. Now you call the child, the child doesn’t hear you, their ears are plugged with earphones. At times, you have to physically remove the earphones when you want to talk to them. Even when the small assignment is given, it’s done, but with earphones on. How do we live in houses where basic communication is dead? I have used the authority vested in me as the father of the house to ban phone chatting in the living room. We have to somehow control these things before they get out of hand.
I have sadly witnessed some people receive a call during a church service and they go out to receive their call. Who is that person calling who is bigger than God? During burials, the Pastor/Priest is busy and someone’s phone rings and you see a person forcing his or her way to the back to answer the call.
I thought when someone is entering Church, the first thing they do is to switch off their phone, not to put it on silent but switch it off. When someone is at a burial they must also switch off their phone. I have also seen people browsing their smart phones during Church services. If you were really busy with your communication — why come to church or the burial to disrespect other people and God? Why not just stay at home and chat?
We have students smuggling phones into classes both at high school and college. They sit at the back and are at it with their phones. This again is disrespect of the teacher. You cannot listen to the teacher and browse your phone at the same time. In the workplace, in an important formal meeting, the chairperson is speaking and someone is busy on their phone. This is disrespect of the meeting and the person who is chairing it.
The smart phone has also brought with it trouble on the roads. People have died in road accidents caused by people using cellphones while driving. Some people have lost their teeth after texting love messages to other people’s wives.
Try to make a difference by avoiding using your phone where it will offend others. Always be patient and wait for the next opportune moment where you can safely use your phone. We really have to change this new smart phone culture that is killing good manners, courtesy and dialogue.
The little things we do change the face of the world. It really begins with you.
Online Reporter