Teachers ask, comment

Morris Mtisi
HOW are you sir? I am confused. Which is the correct way of starting a letter? “I am writing this letter to . . . ” Or “I write this letter to . . .?”
This is a Whatsapp message from a primary school teacher who says she is marking mid-year examinations (no name, only cell phone number).

ANSWER
None of the two ways of beginning a letter suggested above is logical or sensible. We cannot call it an error or describe it WRONG as such, but surely is it clever to tell someone that you are writing a letter?

Every one knows that. Letters are written, not fried, cooked or boiled. Why labour to tell the one reading your letter what he or she knows very well?

That you are writing a letter is clearly not an important secret you have discovered, is it? Go straight into the business of your letter (what the examiner wants you to write about, to convey, to communicate). If you are asked to invite a friend to a party, simply begin:

1. I am delighted to invite you to my sister’s graduation party which is going to be held here at home, House Number 2223 B Dangamvura, on August 15, 2014.

2. My parents are throwing a party for my sister Tsitsi who graduated from university a month ago. They have sent invitations to friends and extended family to attend it. If I didn’t extend an invitation to you, then what kind of a party would that be?

3. Saturday August 23 2014 is wedding day for my sister Tsitsi. Imagine this wedding without you! I am excited to extend this invitation to you to come and help me celebrate this once-in-a lifetime joy.

There are many interesting ways you can begin a letter of this nature. However, telling your best friend that you are writing the letter is not one of them.

Are you all surprised that I am saying what I am saying? You need not! The fact that I was myself taught to tell my friends that I was writing them a letter right in the opening sentence, does not make it clever or sensible.

It is a stale, boring, unintelligent, uninspiring beginning…period!
When we talk about writing interesting, captivating compositions, we are not saying letters are exempted from this skilful craftsmanship.
Letters are compositions of a type. LEST YOU FORGET! How can you teach pupils to stick to boring over-clichéd stereotypes? Ko imwimwi amuzvizwi here kushata kwazvo nemukanwa mweshe?

“I am writing this letter to you . . . zvikazodai nokudeno! Eheka nyorai tsamba yacho, inomboitwa sei tsamba panze pokunyorwa? Do you expect the reader to salute you too, saying, “I am now reading this letter?” Ridiculous, isn’t it? Good teachers of English do not teach their students to be ridiculous. But to be logical, smart, clever, reasonable and intelligent!