Online Reporter
Kimberley Chitambara
IT was prayer and punches along the Bulawayo-Victoria Falls Road when a daring thief learnt the hard way that churchgoers are no soft flock.
Amos Ncube (28) from Cowdray Park, was nabbed by a holy tag team of congregants after he broke into a parked Honda Fit near Umguza River and stole four cellphones while the owner was deep in worship.
Ncube, who probably thought a church service was the perfect cover for his quick heist, didn’t realise he was about to meet an army of believers who don’t just speak in tongues — they act fast too!
According to State prosecutor Mehluli Ndlovu, the incident happened on 9 August around 3pm. The complainant parked his Honda Fit, locked the doors, and went to attend a nearby church service.
While church members’ hands were raised in prayer, Ncube’s were busy smashing a window.
“The accused person came and shattered the complainant’s vehicle window and stole four cellphones before fleeing,” said Ndlovu.
Unfortunately for him, divine justice came quicker than expected. The car alarm went off mid-hymn, sending the owner sprinting out of church like lightning. Spotting Ncube dashing away, the complainant shouted for help and the congregation responded like a gospel choir on fire.
Witnesses say the worshippers turned into holy sprinters, streaking after Ncube across the riverbank in a dramatic scene that could have earned applause on a Sunday action movie marathon.
“He thought he was running from one man, but the next thing there was a whole crusade behind him,” said a witness. “Even the old ladies joined in, waving their Bibles and shouting, ‘Get him!’”
In true team spirit, the congregation cornered the thief and performed a “spirit-filled citizen’s arrest.”
By the time police arrived, all four cellphones had been recovered, untouched and probably still ringing with missed calls from Heaven. Ncube may or may not have been manhandled by the gentle flock. His bruises may have come from falling multiple times as he carried out his mission from hell.
Ncube’s attempted escape from grace landed him in court before Bulawayo magistrate Maxwell Ncube, facing a theft charge. He was remanded in custody to 3 November, where he’ll have time to reflect on how a Sunday service turned into his personal judgment day.
Meanwhile, the victorious worshippers have become the talk of Cowdray Park. The general consensus is that “their unity showed that believers are not pushovers.”
“We are peaceful, yes,” said a church elder, “but touch one of us and the whole congregation will lay hands on you, literally!”
Another congregant added with a laugh, “Next time, he must know: where two or three are gathered, even a thief can’t hide.”
As for the complainant, he walked away with his gadgets, a bruised palm from the chase, and a renewed faith in teamwork.
