Online Reporter
Dear Bra Binzy
I think my mum is having an affair with my husband. He’s a fitness coach and we have been married 4 years without a child. They always compliment each other in a way I find inappropriate. He once said she has a perfect model’s body and looks younger than me. One day she said he should have been called Hercules because he looks like a Greek God — whatever that means. They’re always giggling together and I feel left out. One time I found my mother’s scarf in our bedroom and she has never entered that room as far as I know. One day I asked him about the way he jokes with my mum and he laughed until tears came to his eyes. Am I imagining things? Help me Bra Binzy. What should I do? This thing is affecting my marriage and I can’t even raise it with my mum or dad.
— Stressed, Nomsa Braeside, Harare
Bra Binzy says:
Haiwawo Sisi! Wake up and smell the scandal. When hubby calls your mama a model and Hercules jokes fly across the lounge like confetti, that’s not family bonding — that’s emotional fireworks. Scarves don’t walk into bedrooms on their own, unless your mother moonlights as Casper the Friendly Ghost.
Your man laughed till he cried when you asked? That’s guilt dripping in slow motion. Don’t fool yourself. Where there’s smoke, there’s usually fire. My advice? Call a family summit before you find them starring in “Keeping Up with the In-Laws.” Demand answers. Protect your peace. And sisi, don’t keep quiet because silence is the rope that strangles marriages.
If mama’s scarf is in your bedroom, it’s not fashion — it’s evidence. Open your eyes, girl!
Boss crush, office crash – Workplace romance turns risky
Dear Bra Binzy:
I have fallen in love with my boss. I’ve been on the job less than 6 months but I find myself looking forward to going to work every day so that I can see him and be near him. He’s a cool gentleman who makes me feel important. My boss is always nice to me and inspires me to do more than I ever thought I was capable of. He’s way older than me but I really can’t help myself. I’m even getting jealous when he talks to other girls at the office. I don’t even know if he’s married. I find myself fantasising X-rated stuff about him. I’m going crazy. How do I tell him about my growing feelings without embarrassing myself?
– Disturbed, Bulawayo
Bra Binzy says:
Girl, listen. Falling for your boss is like juggling fire — looks hot, but it burns deep. Right now, in HD while reality is buffering.
Don’t you’re mistaking mentorship for romance. That man might just be grooming you for promotion, not passion.
And the fact that you don’t even know if he’s married? Sis, you’re daydreaming confess feelings at work unless you’re ready to update your CV the next day. Office love stories end faster than lunch breaks. My truth bomb? Control the hormones, keep your job, and find your own Romeo outside the workplace. Work for a pay cheque, not for heartbreak. Don’t let love cost you your job
Love or Liability? Pregnant third time by vanishing man
Bra Binzy, I fell pregnant in 2015 when I was 17 years old and I had to drop out of school. The love of my life went to South Africa to look for a job. I gave birth to twin boys and we lost contact. My parents took care of me and my brother got me a job at a local supermarket. In 2019 my boyfriend returned and we hooked up again. I fell pregnant again and gave birth to another set of twin boys. He had to return to SA to find a job and take care of us. My family was livid and they wanted to throw me out. My man got arrested in a case of mistaken identity and was only able to return in 2023. My family doesn’t want to hear about him, so we meet in secret. I’m paying bills for him and helping him to get back on his feet. Last month he returned to SA where he has been promised a job. I’ve discovered that I’m pregnant again
How do I tell my family? How do I make them see that he’s a wonderful person who makes me happy? Help Bra Binzy, I don’t want to lose this guy.
— Sibusisiwe, Bulawayo.
Bra Binzy says:
Ah sisi, you’re running a baby factory with one customer only! Three pregnancies, two returns from SA, one angry family, and now another bun in the oven? This is not love, it’s a Netflix series called When Hope Meets Denial.
You’re paying his bills while your family foots the anger? Haa, this is daylight emotional bankruptcy. If your family already sees him as Mr Disaster, another pregnancy won’t change the script. Truth bomb: stop trying to make them love him. Instead, ask yourself — do you truly love a man who only shows up between prison sentences and plane tickets?
A man who only brings you babies but no bread is not a husband – he’s a hobby.”
Delicate flower or community project
Dear Bra Binzy, I have a complicated love life and I feel like I’m going mad. Last year, my friend impregnated my girlfriend. I walked in on them having sex in my house. She had a miscarriage and I forgave her. Last Christmas Day I caught her having sex with my mechanic. I almost committed suicide
She explained to me that it was a mistake and she didn’t know what had gotten into her. I forgave her because I love her. Recently I saw strange messages on her phone between her and her stepfather. I think they’re lovers. I no longer trust her and it tears me up inside every time I leave her at home.
I don’t know if she’ll be sleeping with other people. How do I confront her without driving her out of my life? She’s a delicate flower and needs a most delicate approach. She’s graduating at a local university this year and I’m bankrolling her fees. I don’t want to lose my graduate.
– Collen, Mkoba, Gweru
Bra Binzy says:
Eish mfethu, I don’t know if you’re dating a woman or a whole community project. Your girlfriend has toured the cast — friend, mechanic, and stepfather — what’s left? The milkman?
And you’re calling her a delicate flower? My guy, that’s not a flower, that’s kudzu — invasive and choking your sanity. forgiven her more times than Zimbabwe has held elections. Truth bomb? If you keep bankrolling her, you’re not a boyfriend, you’re a sponsor. Confront her? For what? She has already confessed with her actions. My brother, cut your losses before your story ends in the obituary section.
Bruh, stop watering a garden where everyone else is harvesting.
Want Bra Binzy to help solve your messy umjolo saga?
Email: [email protected]. WhatsApp us on 0776201133 with the hashtag #DearBraBinzy.
