Online Reporter
Fadzayi Maposah-Correspondent
I have seen people who get pregnant and express that they were completely unaware of how it happened.
It is not that they do not know how a person gets pregnant. They do know, but this means it was not planned.
If the pregnancy is unplanned, they may find themselves swept up in a whirlwind of emotions, and by the time they realise what is happening, it is already too late.
Understanding that with increased knowledge, there are individuals or couples who actually sit down to plan and decide when they would want to have their first child and the last one.
They also decide what spacing they will have between their children.
These individuals and the couples are among those who have committed themselves to learning about their reproductive health goals and putting it into practice.
It is unfortunate that people tend to put more emphasis into things that they can decide to replace at any time as compared to items that they carry for the rest of their lives.
Have you realised that people plan so much in terms of the car they want to purchase? They look at the finer details with much attention.
Unfortunately, there are many people who tend to pray and hope that they will not get pregnant when they can take preventive measures.
These individuals are of the opinion that they do not use contraception because of various reasons.
Some believe that even if they are sexually active but not yet married, they should refrain from using contraception.
What they do not seem to understand is that because they are sexually active, they are already part of the target group for potential contraception takers.
I will say it now and I always say this, some people are learned but do not put the knowledge into practice.
These are people who have done Biology and learnt how an individual gets pregnant.
They are following the same teachings about the causes of pregnancy that their teachers and textbooks provided, yet they remain resolute in their decision not to use contraception until they are married.
I am not referring to survivors of abuse. I am talking about individuals who willingly engage in sexual intercourse on a regular basis yet consider themselves not eligible for contraception.
It is sad that when they do fall pregnant, at times they are the ones who express ignorance on how it happened.
It is sad that these are not ill informed adolescents or young people but grown women who should be assertive enough to get information and use it appropriately.
When adolescents make some rash decisions, people tend to forgive them more easily and give them a chance because they are young.
What about young career women who have gone through high school and college and make the same decision as adolescents?
Why is it that some young women (and young men too) lack assertiveness? They make decisions in boardrooms and offices and people actually listen to them, yet regarding their own health and personal issues they leave everything to chance.
Being assertive means that one is able to stand up for what they believe and are able to decisions without feeling guilty. Standing up for what one believes in is premised on the grounds that one knows their values.
I was disappointed when I attended a meeting that had young people some of whom were clueless when I did a session on values so as to introduce life skills.
I asked each individual to list their top five values.
I have done this session many a time and I am always amazed how some individuals will gaze at the ceiling deep in thought! The values should inform how an individual lives, yet they are unknown?
Such people who start thinking of what their values are remind me of a group of people who have failed to memorise their national identity yet have many mobile numbers committed to memory!
It just shows what an individual considers important.
So there is a young woman who does not know her values who decides to get into a relationship totally clueless.
There is a Shona saying ‘kuitiswa’ which loosely translated means being made to do things. If one has no focus they can be made to do anything.
They can end up being sexually intimate with someone just because they cannot say no and they are not sure of what to expect from the relationship.
Some young people enter into relationships to see how it goes, not being in the driving seat for the relationship.
There are no boundaries and for everything they solicit ideas from equally poorly informed friends and peers.
Nothing is intentional, they just see as it goes and then they behave accordingly.
They always seem under pressure because they are not grounded anywhere, they are blown from one side to the next lost in the absolute confusion.
Today is the first of March and the 60th day of 2025.
What are your health goals for 2025? You have a list of what you need to do in 2025.
On the list there are things that are trending that you need to have.
How important are these compared to the values that you have?
You are doing things that have consequences that you are fully aware of yet you choose to ignore to take precautions.
As we begin the third month of 2025, let us take stock of our actions.
The unintended may prevail in terms of our health and well-being just because we do not do what we should.
So you do not have ‘becoming a parent in 2025’ on your list, then why are you doing what can make you join the parents club this year?
Think about your actions and the consequences! The unintended can end up changing many aspects of one`s life.
An ill informed decision leaves long lasting effects.
