Online Reporter
Dear Tete Joyie:
My wife keeps telling me that I am worth nothing and her life was ruined after marrying me. What should I do to make her feel that she is lucky to have married me? How do I improve my married life?
Tete Joyie Says:
I hear the pain in what you have shared, and I want to acknowledge how heavy it must feel to be told those things by someone you love. It is important to remember that your worth is not defined by anyone else’s words — but I understand the desire to improve your marriage and help your wife feel more secure and appreciated in the relationship.
Here are some constructive steps you can take:
1. Strengthen Communication
Listen actively: Sometimes people lash out because they feel unheard. Ask her how she feels and listen without interrupting or defending yourself.
Express yourself calmly: Share how her words affect you, but do it without blame. For example: “When I hear that I have ruined your life, I feel hurt and discouraged.”
2. Show Appreciation
Small gestures — compliments, gratitude, or acts of kindness — can shift the tone of a relationship. Notice what she values and acknowledge it. If she works hard, say you admire her dedication. If she Is caring, thank her for it.
3. Invest in Yourself
Confidence and self-respect are attractive. Pursue hobbies, skills, or personal goals that make you feel proud.
When you grow as a person, it often changes how your partner perceives you.
4. Build Shared Joy
Create positive experiences together: a walk, cooking a meal, or planning something fun. Shared laughter and good memories can soften resentment.
5. Seek Support
If the negativity continues, couples counselling can provide a safe space to work through deeper issues. Sometimes, professional guidance helps both partners see patterns they cannot recognise alone.
If you are looking for advice on the tricky situation that you find yourself in, WhatsApp 0716069196, and Tete Joyie will assist you in solving the problem.
Remember, all those who write in remain anonymous
