adminsight of anyone attempting to shoot straight to the counter.
There were near fights, while unlucky souls were punched in the face for “disrupting” the single file.
Coarse language and expletives were hurled at anyone found on the wrong side.
The guard – clearly overwhelmed by the huge number of depositors in the queue – remained quiet to avoid being sucked into arguments over who was in the queue early, the “ndanga ndiripano mukuwasha” nonsense associated with mitsetse.
“He-e he-e, iwe ibvapo. Why do you think you are so special? Join the queue. We have been here since 6am,” people at the back would shout whenever someone walked to the front.
Newspaper and fruit vendors enjoyed brisk business. Their papers and fruits sold fast, what with children craving for a chew and the need to while away time.
Others in the line killed time discussing topics ranging from politics to drought fears, religion, Makandiwa and the story of human skeletal remains that were found in the Harare Exhibition Park.
Some women sat in the shade of the bank building while others used jerseys and bare hands to shield themselves from the scorching morning sun.
Such are the happenings in Harare gentle reader where people are queuing to withdraw their bonuses and salaries.
You are sure to be treated to scenes full of life and drama in these bank queues where some men, long-known to be bachelors, are lining up with members of the fairer sex.
Even Permanent Home Defenders, those women who spend the bulk of the year without setting foot in town, are also accompanying their spouses to the bank to keep misuse at bay.
“This is bonus time my friend. I would have to be extremely foolish to remain at home. He might come home and lie that he lost everything to thieves. I have to be there when everything happens,” an old acquaintance from Glen Norah told this writer.
She said most ladies accompanying their husbands to either the bank or workplace to collect the bonus payments had long lists of things to be bought to make the family’s festive season memorable.
“The children expect new clothes. We need to buy uniforms, niceties and pay rent. I have to be by his side so that he fully understands how I would have spent the money,” the woman said with a chuckle.
But not all of them are so lucky. There is a good number of men who have never gone back home from the day they were handed payslips for the bonus payments. They are staying with friends somewhere to escape the wife’s demands for cash during this time of the year when disposable incomes are generally tight.
A good number of men have resorted to wife-bashing so that she goes to her people and they are left alone to enjoy the fruits of their labour.
Gentle reader, to those not so wise, bonus payments are a period during which they set the pitch for their suffering in January because the more you spend right now the less you are left with to survive early next year.
Non-resident children are not to be left out.
They are being sent by their mothers to look for their fathers so that they collect a stake from his bonus payment.
“Mwana wehuku kunodya aripo. Men are being tracked left, right and centre by the children they had out of wedlock so that they at least get something for Christmas and school fees next year.
“This is why women are accompanying their husbands to the bank. They want every cent accounted for and to ensure the small house gets nothing or very little from the husband,” said a workmate
who spoke on condition of anonymity.
The workmate said judging by the increased human traffic in town since the bonus payments started, very few people will remain with money enough to see them through the harrowing demands of the month of January.
“The problem with bonuses is that they coincide with the need to prepare for the farming season and men have to play a delicate balancing act to ensure they keep their heads above the water,” the
workmate added.
Away from the planning side gentle reader, the period of bonus payments is filled with muggings and even murder.
Consumers of the fruits of other people’s sweat are out in full force to get something to survive on. They play all sorts of dirty tricks to wring cash from their unsuspecting victims. Some waylay people and demand cash while others use blackmail.
Prostitutes are used to identify targets in nightclubs and the moment you fall for her, all the secrets of your wallet, its hiding place and contents are disclosed. At times you are attacked with the prostitute and she will be heard asking you to relinquish all cash to survive.
“Chingovapa chikwama chako chese tiregererwe,” a woman was once heard saying while they were under attack. Barmen too are tricky people to deal with when you have loads of cash. They assess your spending patterns and inform gold fingers that you are a good catch.
Bars are closing late in the night and the moment you hire a cab could be the last time you are seen alive.
Some cabmen work with thieves while some are thieves. As I commit pen to paper gentle reader, the police are doing all they can to control shoppers in downtown Harare and advise them of criminal elements.
They are using public hailers to deliver the message and we shoppers should take heed to avoid being robbed of a memorable Christmas. Shops have introduced bargains while crossborder traders are also out to make cash. Make sure you buy wisely.
Online Reporter