Chevrons: Addressing the large elephant in the room

WELL, the Castle Lager Premiership Soccer League is back and Bra Shakes believes this year’s campaign could be one of the most exhilarating.

On one hand, we have ambitious swashbuckling upstarts like Simba Bhora, Scottland and MWOS, while on the other, we have traditional giants Dynamos, CAPS United and Highlanders fighting for relevance in a league that is fast evolving.

So, we might witness either a revolution led by the “Young Turks”, as already demonstrated by Simba Bhora, which clinched the title in its second season last term, or a resurrection of the fallen and fading giants.

Only time will tell.

But this week’s instalment is not about the Castle Lager Premiership Soccer League, nor is it even about football.

This time, we have to address the elephant in the room when it comes to the Chevrons.

The recent tour by Ireland was an eye-opener for some. Zimbabwe ran away victors in two out of the three formats, courtesy of a 2-1 win in the One-Day Internationals and 1-0 in the rain-affected Twenty20 matches.

The only blemish was that 63-run loss in the once-off Test at the start of the series.

By all accounts, this should be a time of celebration and introspection given Zimbabwe’s prior records in the two formats.

But there has been next to no talk or celebration.

The next couple of months will be a trying period for Zimbabwe, what with the historic Test against England coming up in May, the final round of the T20 World Cup qualifiers and, more importantly, the country co-hosting the ICC Under-19 and ODI World Cup in 2026 and 2027, respectively.

But let us start with the elephant in the room: What is the deal with Tadiwanashe Marumani?

Does he have compromising videos of the convener of selectors, David Mutendera?

Why is Marumani continuously given chance after chance?

What does the boy have on you Diva and your cohorts?

Marumani’s T20 figures during the just-ended tour by Ireland were: 7, 1 and 1 runs.

Before that, during the 2024 season, the situation was: 27, 32, 13, 1, 14, 31 and 2 runs.

One of the notable discoveries of the just-ended Ireland tour was the potential Brian Bennett and Ben Curran have as possible white-ball openers.

Given their age and raw potential, what they need is a consistent run of games in both T20 and ODI cricket to build some sort of rapport and chemistry.

Now, that cannot happen if we keep getting Marumani foisted in every T20 series, robbing the public of watching the duo bat together.

Bra Shakes is not one to knock a kid when he is down and going through a rough patch, but Zimbabwe Cricket, please do something.

The upcoming England tour for the one-off Test match is bigger than just a cricket match.

This is an opportunity for cricket to bring the two nations back together, as sport always does.

Zimbabwe and England have not played a bilateral series against each other in any format since 2004 due to frosty political relations.

England forfeited points in the 2003 World Cup after refusing to travel to Harare.

The England and Wales Cricket Board (ECB) also subsequently suspended bilateral agreements with Zimbabwe in 2005.

However, relations between the two countries have since thawed, leading to a resumption of dialogue between the two cricket boards.

It is for this reason that the whole world will be watching, and the Chevrons better not embarrass us by putting lacklustre performance, like turning a four-day match into a two-day affair.

Planning needs to start now.

Interestingly, Zimbabwe is set to become the first country in the modern era to be paid a “touring fee” by the ECB.

So, it is natural that most local cricketers — including the scarcely talented — would want in on the action.

But let us not be tempted to go down that route. During our tour of England, set for May 22-25, as well as the two World Cups that we will co-host, all eyes from around the world will be on us.

It, therefore, behoves us to have a strong and competitive Chevrons side.

There is no time for Mickey Mouse business or monkeying around.

Until next time.

Peace.

Yours sincerely,

Bra Shakes.