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Rutendo Gwatidzo, Changing Perspectives
It is not always easy to express yourself, or how you feel.
Sadness and crying may not be enough. You may feel like you want friends, but you hate socialising. You may even feel like you want to be left alone, yet you do not want to be lonely.
You probably experience contradicting feelings, and you feel like you are losing yourself; you want to control your thoughts, but they do control you.
You feel like you are in a battle that you do not want, but you are forced to fight.
Depression is like the weather, it just comes when you least expect it, and it may give you sudden swings.
You may feel extremely hot, but before you realise, it is too cold and while you try to adjust it starts raining cats and dogs, and before you find shelter, it is probably windy.
Depression is like that feeling when you lose something, but you have no clue as to where and how you lost it.
All you may know is that you had something, but you no longer have it. You may try to reason with yourself, but your mind sticks.
Depression is a mental health disorder. Whether you suffer from it daily or deal with bouts of depression, it is important for you to know that you are not alone in this mental health battle.
Millions of people worldwide suffer from mental illness and depression.
It is acceptable to feel messed up, it does not mean that you are defective, it simply means you are human. Do not be alone, do not isolate yourself, find a way to express your feelings.
It is refreshing sometimes to hear a few words from others who are feeling it or who went through it.
The reality!
I believe that at one point or another, we all experience depression or mental illness. It is only that these are wounds that never show in most cases.
I believe we all come across those phases in life where we experience grey and numb days and where we feel like we are carrying the whole world on our shoulders.
If you are in this category right now, know that you are not alone.
Personally, I have gone through a lot of depressing times in life and I know that many did and still do. It is important to let those feelings out of the inside of you.
Sometimes, hiding those wounds can only make them worse. Expose them, get help and heal faster. A big part of depression is feeling lonely even in a room full of people.
Sometimes you actually feel lonelier when surrounded than when you are alone. You may feel like you cannot trust anyone or no one will be able to understand.
The danger!
Mental pain is less dramatic than physical pain yet it is more common, severely damaging and hard to bear than physical pain.
The sad thing is that the more you try to hide it is the more you are likely to increase it. Come to think of it, it is much easier to say you back is aching or you have a toothache than tell someone that your heart is broken.
You may reach a point where you feel hopeless and helpless, and you lose the strength to fight on. Yes, fight, but for what exactly becomes the question.
Is it worth it after all, especially when those around you regard you as a mental issues person. It has become easy for some people to judge, give names and to watch without helping when most of them are probably going through the same or went through the same.
Depression can be so insidious.
We have lost millions of people to depression, we live among people with mental health issues more than we may see.
I believe every human being experiences secret sorrows that the world knows not.
We all experience dark moments; it is just that some are better at dealing with it than others.
The painful things we all experience in life are the things we are born to fight though we are destined to win. The struggle is real but the victory is certain if you are willing to fight the right way.
Sometimes, all you need is those that truly love and care for you. Sometimes, you may need a total stranger to assist you, someone who will not judge you. You need to battle depression instead of suffering it.
Wounds that never show are deeper and hurtful than those that bleed. Depression is like a cancer that eats you from the inside.
Do not suppress your feelings altogether.
Depression can repel people from you. You need love but you may find yourself dishing out anger, hatred, bitterness, loneliness and all sorts of things that push people away.
Look deeper!
If you find yourself displaying any of those mentioned, a combination or any in the same bracket then like music legend Oliver Mtukudzi sang: “Tsvaga chikonzero chaita musoro uteme (Find the reason why your head is aching ).”
You may find yourself at a party where people are taking pictures, but then you find yourself boiling with anger.
If that is you, consider dealing with depression.
It is time to stop pointing fingers, pretending, judging or being selfish.
If you can be in the habit of looking at someone closely and with care, ask how that person is doing, you may see tears flowing. On the other hand, if you can be that person who admits weakness, you have a better chance to save yourself from harm.
It is acceptable to tell someone that you are struggling.
It is not over!
An anonymous author once said; “Bent but not broken, scared but not disfigured, sad but not hopeless, tired but not powerless, angry but not bitter, depressed but not giving up.”
Even Paul in the Bible admitted at some point that he was hard pressed on every side, but not despair.
Why then do you want to judge others or why then do you want to pretend to live a smooth life all the time.
Be challenged to see things from a different perspective. Be encouraged to give the best version of yourself and to live a peaceful life knowing that, whatever you may be going through, you are not the first, and neither will you be the last. Be inspired to contribute towards making this world a better place to live, let it be for your benefit, the benefit of those around you and your future generations to come.
Together may we arise and make this world a better place.
Break the bias…. you are not an exemption. What affects one, may affect us all.
May we fight depression, mental health, yes together we are strong, together we can make it.
Rutendo Gwatidzo is the managing consultant at The HUB HR Consultancy – as a culture and change management specialist. She is a multi-award winning leader, consultant, speaker and coach. She is also an author of ‘Born to Fight’ and ‘Breaking the Silence’ books. Feedback: 0714575805/ [email protected] Rutendo Gwatidzo_Official fb public page.
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