adminWith Swag Mama
This week we get onto the touchy topic of teen dating in response to a request from a CL reader. The first thing I need to say is that when it comes to such matters, personal choice becomes very important and at the end of the day, only you can avoid going into bad places.
You need to start off by deciding what the right time for you to start getting into relationships is. Most people would say 16 is about right, but I believe that is just a number. It is not a hard and fast rule and if you would rather wait until later, that is okay.
What do you want from a relationship? Are you looking for a special friend? Is it about sex? Or do you just want a partner because everyone else appears to be in a relationship? I guess saying yes to the last two questions means that you are most probably heading for trouble already.
But to move on, what sort of person would you describe as your ideal partner? What are the qualities that they must have? Do they have to be bright in school? Would you become involved with a player if the chance arose?
Knowing what you want from a relationship and who you want to be with means that you are able to set the parameters. You know exactly who you want to date and how far you want to go. You will not be manoeuvred into a situation where you will be pushed or forced into doing things that you would rather not do.
Sometimes teens let themselves just drift into affairs with people who are all wrong for them. The end result is predictably heartbreak. Sometimes there are worse consequences like unwanted pregnancies and or humiliation as the person dumps you in a nasty and public manner.
You need to know that although right now it feels like you will love this person forever, very few teen relationships lead to lifetime commitment. So keep things simple and always play it cool.
Do not make this person the centre of your life. It is your future that deserves your full effort, concentration and devotion, not some dude or chick, no matter what promises they make.
A person can pretend to be exactly what you need. Listen to your friends and other people. If everyone is negative about that person, then chances are he or she is really bad news on two feet. Get out of that relationship right now.
If you are already in a bad place, do not worry. Your whole life is still ahead of you. Stop crying over the loser who let you down. Apply yourself to the things that really matter in your life. Call a friend you have not had time for recently and go out and have some clean fun. Laugh at some jokes.
Take comfort in the fact that next time you will be able to spot a player from across the room and you will never allow your heart to be broken again.
Online Reporter