adminYoyoyo, watsap peeps? How ya all doing? Welcome to all our Generation X peeps. Photos photos, photos ma’ guys, we need to see you in this paper. Send us your mirrors ya’all like yesta’dy.
If you want to participate, just look out for us during the week in like the coolest places in town.
If you miss out don’t sweat! Send us your pics, poems, sayings, jokes, stories and stuff anytime, any day on 0772 933 845.
If you don’t see it in the week you sent it; we promise you it will be in the next or the next or the next, whatever – yoooo, all I’m saying is stay cool, don’t stress just keep checking.
WHATS WITH THE SEX THINGIE??
Yoyoyo, in the next couple of weeks we will be giving you feedback on what we found out on the streets when we asked the question, WATS UP WITH YOUTH AND SEX. Soooooooo msg me ya’all, tell us wat yr thots are on the big word SSSSEEEEXXXXX.
Dear ladies and gentlemen
lf yu have slept with over eight people u have no right to call your reproductive organ” A private part”, it now belongs to the Government under the Ministry of Tourism, Department of Explicit Entertainment and Pleasure.
And if it happens to be more than 10 people, it now belongs to the United Nations under the Department of Humanitarian Council Donor Aid. And if it is more than 15 people then it is now a universal charger. Do u read yo Bible yesterday I went to the police station to certify my documents. When I entered at the police station, I found a police officer reading the Bible, in the book of Genesis. I was very impressed so I asked him “Who killed Abel, Adam’s son?”
He answered, “I don’t know, ask Sgt.Khumalo over there. He is the one who deals with murder cases.” kkkkk.
WhatsApp best Zim jokes
Pane ndege yaive nemapenzi aienda kumental therapy kuChina. Rimwe benzi rakaenda kuna pilot zvikanzi ndidzidzise kuoperator ndege
Pilot: tanga wanyararidza vamwe vako.
Benzi : Ok no problem.
Akabuda within a second manga manyararwa ndokudzoka akadzidziswa ndege kusvika akugona.
Pilot: ko iwe manyararwa kudai kwakanaka here
Benzi : No ndavavhurira door ndikati endai kunotambira panze ndimbodzidziswa ndege.
Dnt laugh alone forward to 5 groups.
WASU ACHINAMATA
Mwari imwimwi diko munefavour. Ingawani Abraham musharukwa hake akakumbira mupwere imwimwi mukamupa.
Uyuwo onini Jonah wakaitwe swallow ngeshark,digestive system ikaite malfunction kwakuite vomit.
Mukoma Dan akaitwa throw mugomba remahungry lions,imwimwi mukadziite lose appetite.
Iye Moses hatimboreketiba, akanera mvura ngendonga ichibva yaita separate nepamiddle kuzoti ariElijah haaaaaaa,kubva mwaite wekusenda kuheaven ngerocket.
Asi inini hangu Wasu ndirikuda pondo basi yekunera Zed imwimwi mwakundiite deny, ngenyi Mwari muchidaro.
WANYURA
A guy was in love wit a girl but neva had the guts to tell her. One night around 11pm he gathered some courage and sent her a text saying, “I love u, I wanna date u. Pls reply and tell me how u feel”.
A few secs later he recieved a msg alert on his fon. He was so scared and tensed to open it dat night so he decided not to check and reply until the next morning when he’s less tensed.
When he woke up the nxt day he prayed seriously abt d msg for gud news, did his morning chores, brushd his teeth,ate his brkfast, had his bath, dressed up then climbed into bed n picked his fon to read the msg. This was d response he read:
“Dear customer you have insufficient balance to send this msg. Please recharge your account and try again”
WHY I WILL NEVER TEACH PRE-SCHOOL KIDS AGAIN
Kucreche kwandinoshanda kune kamwana kainzi Vicky. Ende kari cute futi kari sweet.
Nezuro todakuchaisa ndakakawana kachifirira kupfeka maboots ako. Ndakasvika ndokukabatsira, veduwe raiva basa maboots aiita semadiki nemasize two chaiwo. Ndakaita five minutes chaidzo. Ndapedza ndotirega ndiende, zvikanzi naVicky, “Teacher mandipfekedza banana.” Nditarisewo ndione zveshuwa ndapfekedza mwana banana.
Hapaya pakunobvisa maboots aya, dzakaita three minutes dzekukurura bhutsu chete.Ndakazokunda ndokukapfekedza zvakanaka zvenharo zviya zvekutanga zvakare.
Ndapedza ndonzwa kotizve: “Teacher maboots aya haasi angu!”
Ndakamerera nehasha asi semunhu anoshanda nevana ndakaita moyo murefu ndokukakumura maboots aye.
Ndapedza ndikabvunza kuti ako aivepi. Akapindura kuti ako aive kumba aya aive esister yako akaive kapfekedzwa namhamha vako.
Ndakabvunda nehasha, asi basa rangu ndinoita nemazvo. Takapfekedzana maboots aye zvekare. Ndapedza zvikanzi naVic ky chindipfekedzai masocks cho?”
Apa ndakashaya kuti ndoseka here kana kuchema.?
Zvinyoronyoro ndakabvunza kuti komasocks acho arikupi. Shasha ndokutanga kuseka zvayo yakanditarisa zvikanzi, “ndamapfinyira mukati memaboots angu.”
I simply resigned.
WISDOM OF THE WEEK
Humility and perfectionism are traits that are hardly found in one character as humility demands downheartedness,while perfectionism exudes pride and to some extend,arrogance.
Sent in by Marlon Kakurira
How white people and black people react when they see a snake in their house:
THE WHITE PEOPLE’S REACTION
“Hey guys, we have a visitor today. Nicole, please go to my room and bring the phone book. It’s ok, honey, don’t be scared, I’ll call the national parks. Tracy, calm down, daddy won’t let it bite you, stay right where you are, we must not make it mad. It’s God’s creature we will call the national parks and let them do their job.”
THE BLACK PEOPLE’S REACTION
“Yohweeee! Nyoka, hey, iyo, hokoyo Tambu unorumwa! Huya nedanda kurumidza! Vanhu vakutijairira kutumira nyoka masikati akadai! Mai Tambu, mhanya unodaidza Madzibaba Kerebhu vauye nemuteuro vatishandire. Iwe Trymore kurumidza nedanda mhani, baba vangu vari pachuru. Raini rino raka takura pavaroyi…
Note: Yeah, yeah, it’s like time to dip, so listen up ya’ll, check this out……don’t call us “dog”, don’t come knocking on e’ door, jus get wt e’ program and SEND yr stuff to chat/watsapp in your own lingo to 0772933845 – thtso’l.
GENERATION X.
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