adminhurdle or battle or difficulty can withstand the power of love.
The Bible says love should be the centre theme of all that we do. As 1 Corinthians 13 says everything else, no matter how dramatic, is meaningless if love is not the underlying principle.
It goes further to say that love is the greatest. According to this text love is a weapon against all these negative forces such as selfishness, impatience, bitterness, envy, hate and many others that you dear reader can think of.
I believe that every human being has a yearning for love. We all need to be loved. I know there are people who appear indifferent and make it appear that they have no need for love.
In my own analysis I think such people are putting up a defensive mechanism which protects them from further hurt.
People such as these become so vulnerable when they are shown genuine and sincere love. They crumble under the force of love. Maslow on his Hierarchy of Needs listed the need to belong.
Human beings have a desire to belong to a group that they can identify with or be identified with. This belongingness is a deep yearning for love and acceptance. Christians for example are supposed
to be known by their love for one another, the kind of love that cuts across all natural barriers among people.
This type of love is called agape or unconditional. It is this love that is transformative in nature because it is not depended on what the person does or has done or can do. It is love that accepts a person as he/she is.
So many times we get people who have experienced rejection in their lives in many different forms. People such as these become either confrontational or withdrawn as a defense mechanism.
Sometime this year I attended a funeral of my cousin in one of the high density suburbs. There was a group of young men who spent the night singing and dancing with the mourners.
At first when they moved into the house they were rather ill-mannered showing no respect for the elderly women who were in the house. They were confrontational.
Except for a few women who responded in the same manner most of the women showed tolerance. Through talking to them in a civil manner as well as saying in a motherly tone words such as “mwanangu” (my child) and recognizing their leadership structures to get certain things done changed the atmosphere in the house.
It was amazing as the “boys” started controlling each other. At first the “boys” disrupted prayers and religious songs but by early hours of the morning we had a “converted” lot that even in their drunkenness had “testimonies” to share.
Maybe had we spent another day or follow ups made that little dosage of love could have transformed these men into better people.
A study that I did in 2009 revealed that deviance among adolescents is due to lack of human connection. McDowell notes that deviance is a problem of relational disconnection between parents and
children or adults and children.
He goes further to say that the children of today are connected to the world through high tech devices but lack human connection.
In a similar vein another writer Penton underscores the importance of relationship building in rehabilitation of street children because it restores a sense of security and belongingness as well as faith.
Love is by nature transformative for it builds bridges where they are no bridges. It reaches to the innermost being and therefore convicts a person of the bad and the good.
The story of Zacchaeus that is recorded in the Bible demonstrates what love can do. Jesus Christ went to eat with Zacchaeus who belonged to the most unpopular group of people – tax collectors.
Zacchaeus was overcome by such love that this encounter was a turning point of his life. So many times we resort to shouting, naming, labeling and threatening but this does not create lasting change if at all.
People respond differently, someone can get worse because to them by labeling them you are “baptizing them. Others do things for your eyes only and never coming from the heart.
Love is indeed a powerful weapon on its own. There is no need for talking it has its own language. Love is there to be given away and by so doing touch lives.
It is not only for those who love us but even those that hate us. I now understand why it has been said “What benefit is there to love only those that love us.”
This kind of compartmentalized love does not influence the world. It builds cliques that do not build families, societies or nations. It reinforces differences and widens divisions instead of building bridges and relationships. I know there some people who are die hard who remain the same or seem to get worse the more we give them love.
They do not appreciate at all it is as if you are obliged to do these things for them.
Painful as it may, do not be discouraged as the godly view says love should persevere.
If we are more compassionate and less judgmental as well as seek to understand others than be understood we can love unconditionally.
By so doing we can touch many hearts and transform many lives. Take up love as a tool for transforming your world.
Bongani Ndlovu
Online Reporter