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Dr Chido Rwafa Madzvamutse
MentalAC Wellness
As discussed in previous articles, mental health is defined as a state of well-being in which an individual realises his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a meaningful contribution to their community.
When our children can think clearly, develop well physically, emotionally and socially and they are able to learn, they can thrive and reach their full potential.
In addition to having their physical needs met, children critically need unconditional love, engagement and communication, opportunities to learn, to play and to grow as well as guidance and discipline to thrive.
Factors that can affect a child’s mental health
Children are some of the most vulnerable members of our families and communities.
While genetic make-up of a child can put them at risk of various mental health problems, many times the environment in which a child grows, develops and learns can significantly affect their mental wellbeing and their ability to thrive.
Parenting is one key factor that influences mental wellbeing of a child. It has been found that ideally as parents and caregivers we should aim to be authoritative, this means ensuring our child knows that we love them, but we also put in place appropriate, firm boundaries for discipline. Research shows that parents who love, but do not discipline are indulgent. Parents who discipline, but do not love are authoritarian and parents who neither love nor discipline are neglectful. Indulgent, authoritarian or neglectful parenting makes it difficult for children to thrive.
The home environment also greatly influences a child’s mental health. When the family is dysfunctional or the home environment is chaotic, this can affect how a child develops both physically and emotionally. Children are not immune to stress and even when we are careful to not involve them, they will be affected by family stress, arguments in the home, financial challenges, illness in the family, alcohol and drug use in the family or exposure to violence.
The school environment is where most children spend most of their day and can be a great place for children to develop emotionally and socially. Teachers can have a strong positive impact on how a child sees themselves and others. Schools can unfortunately be a source of stress for some children. Children may get stressed about their friends, about challenges with learning and about bullying.
The social environment also affects a child’s mental health. Children are exposed to technological devices younger than ever. This can expose them to inappropriate and even dangerous internet and social media content which can greatly affect their mental wellbeing and their ability to thrive in the real world.
Could my child have a mental health problem?
One in five children struggle with a mental health problem globally. Children can also develop common mental health challenges such as depression, anxiety and substance use.
Additionally, children may develop conditions unique to children such as childhood behavioural disorders and attachment disorders. Common symptoms and signs of possible mental health problems in children include:
Sad or irritable mood
Persistent tantrums
Selective mutism (being unable to speak in certain usually social situations)
Changes in sleep patterns (poor sleep or sleeping excessively)
Frequent seemingly stressed related physical health symptoms (stomach aches and headaches)
Delay in development or decline in development ( bedwetting in a child who had now been fully toilet trained)
Avoiding interacting with others (social isolation)
Loss of interest in what the child used to love doing
Deterioration in school performance
Restlessness, inability to sit still or focus
How can I help my child to be mentally healthy and to thrive?
Love, engage and communicate: Children need love just as much as they need food.
Love starved children will struggle to develop physically and emotionally. Parents and caregivers who are engaged in their children’s day to day life and activities, parents who know who their children’s friends are and what their children are struggling with emotionally are better able to pick up when their child is struggling and can intervene early.
Acknowledge emotions: Children experience emotions, even difficult emotions just like adults do. Parents and caregivers can provide an environment where those emotions can be safely expressed and the home can be an environment where we all, children and adults, learn how to manage difficult emotions in a healthy, respectful way.
Coach on and model how to handle difficult emotions: Children learn more from what we as parents and caregivers do than what we tell them to do.
It is critical as adults in a child’s life to not always hide our difficult emotions, but to sometimes allow our children to see us face and manage our difficult emotions.
This helps them realise that we are not perfect, we also face emotional challenges but we can express and manage them in a healthy way.
Encourage development of strong family relationships and friendships: The ability to form meaningful relationships is a critical part of mental wellbeing in both children and adults. Our family and friends form a support network that help us live and thrive. We should not live life alone and our children should not either.
Model and teach physical self-care: Eating healthy, exercising regularly, sleeping well, limiting time on the phone, tablet or laptop are all things we should do as parents and caregivers and we can show our children how to do this too.
Teach problem solving: Life is full of challenges and our children are not immune to them. As part of critical life skills, problem solving, with help from parents and caregivers can help children to not get overwhelmed by life’s challenges and cope better with life.
Help your child develop a positive, hopeful perspective to life: A positive perspective and a sense of hope are important for maintaining mental wellbeing. Children often learn how to see the world and its challenges by observing how their parents and caregivers see the world.
We can help children become more resilient by helping them develop a healthy perspective and staying hopeful in adversity.
Believe in your child and their unique purpose for being:
It is empowering to have someone in your life appreciate you and believe in you. Our children need to know that we believe in them and their purpose in life, that they are loved, that they have value and that they can make a meaningful contribution to our families and communities. As we strive to be more aware of our mental health and wellbeing, it is important to become intentional as parents and caregivers and aware of issues that may be affecting our children’s mental health so that we can help them to thrive.
If you think that your child may be struggling with a mental health problem, please contact your nearest health care provider and get help.
Association of Healthcare Funders of Zimbabwe (AHFoZ) article written by: Dr Chido Rwafa Madzvamutse, Consultant Psychiatrist. Feedback +263714987729) (www.ahfoz.org ; [email protected])
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