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Dear Tete Barbara
I work hard to put food on my family’s table everyday even though my drunkard husband is still alive. Some days I feel that life will be better if he is gone.
My husband does not work after he was fired for being drunk on the job. As if being a drunkard is not enough, he has now resorted to stealing my hard earned money.
Just three days ago, he stole $50 I was saving for Christmas from my handbag which he spent on beer with his friends. Asking him is useless.
I just want him gone, but where will he go? We have three children together. He is an orphan and jobless.
Tete Responds:
When you get married, the idea is to gain a partner and a friend, not a burden. Unfortunately at times you have to deal with serious issues in marriages.
You did not mention whether your husband was always a drunkard or if this is a habit he picked up after marriage. Sometimes, alcohol abuse is a sign of a bigger underlying problem. Perhaps your husband needs to deal with other issues first before he can become a responsible and trustworthy partner.
You may need to engage the services of a trained counsellor or a therapist to help him resolve his problem as it is clear that you are fed up. A trained counsellor can give you special advice on how you should handle this dilemma without pushing your husband into a deeper ditch.
Separating from him might just make things worse and this could also affect you in future. You appear to be concerned about his well-being, so I advise you to be there for him and not dump him as much as you need your personal space and stability.
Find a close relative or family friend with whom you can share the burden with. You cannot do it alone. You also need a good support system around you throughout this difficult period.
Gods Speed!
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