Fake assets, fake blasts, fake job offers

Khuphuka Nasingeni
No one wants to be taken for a ride no matter the circumstances.Aï¿½ This principle is respected even among criminals; more like having honesty within dishonest dealings!

This son of Nasingeni likes flipping through the Press and devouring the cocktails therein, and one article caught his attention this week.Aï¿½ Let me start by congratulating you because if you are reading this, you definitely survived Easter, do not worry about your reddened eyes, worse things happened to some people.

I was saying, I stumbled on this article in which some lady of the night (and day) was crying foul over losing her regular client to a known competitor who apparently seduced the man with fake assets. I could not tell whether it was sour grapes or what but this sister warned that unlike her, her competitoraï¿½ï¿½s curvy hips would remain in her panties!

She did not end there.Aï¿½ She felt she had a right to fight for aï¿½?her married manaï¿½? as she was known to the manaï¿½ï¿½s wife, upgrading her status to that of a small house. Be warned ladies, do not go looking for your hubbyaï¿½ï¿½s girlfriend because once you catch her, there is an automatic upgrade on the system and software starts to initiate installation of small house file!Aï¿½ I also could not believe the cheek by the fake-hip smooth operator, who after baiting her friendaï¿½ï¿½s man, and the man falling for it hook, line and sinker then invited the losing candidate for drinks with the couple!

Across the continent some guy was also daring and fake, or was it daringly fake, this time about 30 000 feet above ground. The BCB(baby come back) syndrome sometimes takes people are bit too far; reminds me of an advert of some fast food outlet that goes aï¿½?once itaï¿½ï¿½s got you, itaï¿½ï¿½s got youaï¿½ï¿½, meaning the craving for hot wings.

This one is far from funny, a disastrous attempt at launching a tragi-comedy at 30 000 feet.Aï¿½ We are relieved that our loser of the week, that Egyptian hijack drama king,Seif Eldin Mustafa, was finally arrested after hijacking a plane load in Alexandra en route to Cairo and diverting the plane to Cyprus, where it landed in Lanarca.

The guy had a fake explosives jacket strapped around him.Aï¿½ The love-lorn man said he had not seen his estranged wife and children for 24 years, and due to his brush with the law, was not allowed to leave Egypt.

The Cypriot leader Nicos Anastasiades even joked about it at a Press conference. Asked to confirm whether the incident was over a woman, Mr Anastasiades laughed and said: aï¿½?Always there is a woman involved.aï¿½?

There are quite striking similarities between this case and the Harare fake-hip woman. Both cases had to do with matters of the heart, and both protagonists used fake equipment to accomplish their goals, and they were both dramatically exposed!

I would give quite a bundle to get my hands on the flight recorder. I believe embedded therein are some of the most heartfelt prayers and confessionsaï¿½ï¿½ just one session of listening to the recording, dear preachers, could lead hordes to repentance than the Biblical Jonah ever did in his voyage to Nineveh!

Staying with things fake, we hear that hundreds of Zimbabwean women are stranded in Kuwait after they flew to that country after fake promises of well-paying jobs.

We hear womenaï¿½ï¿½s organisations have been mum on the sufferings of these adults; not to mention menaï¿½ï¿½s organisations! Yes, menaï¿½ï¿½s organisations. .