Man finally speaks up after years of physical, economic abuse

Spiwe Sarakunze

Herald Reporter

A HARARE man who had endured abuse at the hands of his wife has won a reprieve after he dragged her to court for redress.

Fundomu Fundo told Harare Civil Court magistrate Ashton Dube the abuse he has endured at the hands of his wife, Asiyeni Baneti, including severe assault resulting in injury to his privates.

“My wife is too controlling to the extent that I cannot fight back. I’m living like a child in my own house,” he said.

Fundo alleged that Baneti has been violent towards him on several occasions, with the most disturbing incident being the one where she hurt his privates.

The attack, which reportedly left him in intense pain and humiliation, was the culmination of tension, manipulation, and abuse within their marriage.

Fundo told the court that his wife would lose her temper over minor disagreements, often resorting to violence as a way of asserting control and dominance over him.

But the abuse did not stop there. Fundo revealed that Baneti also forced him to quit his job, when he refused to resign, she reportedly made his life unbearable, taunting him, insulting his masculinity, and threatening to destroy his reputation.

Fundo said he endured relentless emotional torment as Baneti sought to undermine his confidence and independence.

“She does not have limitations with words; she calls me names even in front of people,” he said.

He told the court that she forbade him from disclosing their marital status to anyone.

“She said I should keep it secret, that she didn’t want people to know I am her husband,” he said.

He said he had chosen to come forward to get help since his life was at risk ever since his wife had threatened to hire thugs to kill him.

“It took me immense bravery to speak up about domestic abuse, especially in view of our culture where men are expected to be strong,” said Fundo.

“I have suffered enough, I want to be free from this constant pain and humiliation.”

Baneti disputed the allegations, stating that she was the victim of the abuse.

“The issue is about infidelity. I warned him to stop bringing women into the matrimonial home, but he wouldn’t listen. I respect him, and I will not disgrace the man I love,” she argued.

She told the court that her husband ran to report to cover up his issues. Baneti explained that as a woman, she deserves respect from her husband.

However, the magistrate expressed concern about the seriousness of the allegations, noting that domestic violence is a crime regardless of who commits it, therefore, he ruled in favour of Fundo.

The court reminded both parties that marriage should be based on mutual respect, trust, and care, not control, intimidation, or violence.